The Simpson 6

Life So Far

2012-02-10T12:40:00.001-06:00

A quick update in pics:

This handsome guy had been working his "Justin Beiber" hair for far too long, so he finally got is all cut off! I miss his hair, but it was getting to be a bit much:) You'll see his new 'do down below.

Um, yeah. We let our 2 year old handle hunting rifles? Don't report us, please...

Jeff and I finally got to go out on a date!

This winter has been crazy warm. Makes me a bit sad to have NO snow this year, but it's great for the kids because they love to be outside. Here's one of their sandbox creations - a massive tunnel that they tried to convince me Ryan could fit through!

Ella-Kathryn and Ryan (with his new haircut).

Will, as always in fighting mode, with this new haircut.

Jack noticed that he and I had matching jammies:) Gray t-shirts and red plaid bottoms - he was truly happy about this. Sweet boy!

I saw this great, super-easy method for curling your hair and made Ella-Kathryn my guinea pig! You just put a stretchy headband around your head like a sweatband and then begin wrapping pieces of hair up and over the band, going around the whole head. anyway, the result was amazing! She looked so cute, but of course it didn't last through the night. Next time I'll put more product in and then hairspray the tar out of it!

Over the years we have lost many a dining chair. Kids, adults, moves. They just have bit the dust one by one. So, after living with horribly mismatched chairs for a while now, Jeff built some benches! Here are Jack and EK helping stain the new seating!

Ok so I know there's much more to update you on, but for now this will have to do! Ha!

Home Educating Family Publishing

2012-01-21T08:32:00.000-06:00

Home Educating Family Publishing
Great contest over at Home Education Family Magazine! These flip charts and helps for times tables are super helpful!

First Snow and a Party!

2012-01-14T23:21:00.000-06:00

We had our first snow last week. A dusting really, but the kids were thrilled to wake up to snow:) It was pretty darn cold, windchill around 14, that day, but of course they had to go out and play for a bit.

Then, today we hosted the family birthday party for Jack, who will be turning 10 on Tuesday! What in the world???? Wasn't he just born???? Seriously, he is such a great kid - loves the Lord, his family, friends and neighbors and so enjoys being outdoors. He gets a kick out of racing his RC car with his Dad, and proving his me wrong when after I do a read-aloud and wonder if anything I ever read will sink in, he blows me away with all that he's retained! We can't wait to see what God has in store for him and what he will do for the kingdom!

From his Aunt Erin and Unlce Jason and cousins, He recieved a cool RCcar stand to hold his car up off the table so that he can work more easily on it. From Poppy, he got some new tires, and some cool cash from his Grandma and Granpa. We dug into a white cake frosted with chocolate icing and a whipped cream middle, per a request from the bday boy himself!

It was a fun day - one we get to repeat next Sat. when some of his buddies come over to help celebrate:) Normally we do it all on one day, but with the boys getting bigger it just seemed more logical to spread it out - for my sanity as much as anything!

Indoor Picnic

2012-01-11T12:13:00.000-06:00

I needed to reorganize my homekeeping binder, and for reasons that escape even me, I decided today would be a good day! Yes, right after doing the breakfast dishes and before beginning our school day, I busted open every binder/folder/pocket and emptied it all out - onto every available surface.

So when lunchtime rolled around I had to get creative as to where we could eat! Indoor picnic anyone? 4 kiddos definitely thought that was a great idea!

So happy I can please these sweet faces some of the time:)

New Year Changes

2012-01-03T16:36:00.000-06:00

When we returned from our Christmas travels, we cleaned house and then I cleaned my brain:) I spent a whole day prepping for the upcoming semester. And I learned a painful lesson about myself. We lament Jack's lack of diligence on an almost daily basis around here. It has worn me down as his mom and teacher more times than I care to admit. However, as I was looking back over our fall semester it became clear how little we had accomplished! And how that meant our spring would be so full and rather crowded with academics - squeezing out some of the fun things I had hoped to do. Alas, it is all moi. In my own sin, my own laziness, lack of diligence, I had allowed the kids to not complete work, to push it off til tomorrow, or a handful of tomorrows. An eye-opener for sure! Thank goodness for grace and mercy, because after spending some time in prayer about the whole matter, the Holy Spirit reminded me of a "system" that we have now implemented. The Workbox system, originated by Sue Patrick, was meant to keep children who had troubles staying focused, on task. I had briefly discussed this with Jeff in the late summer, but dismissed it because the original plan calls for a lot of space, space that we simply don't have to use with shelving and shoeboxes. So I decided to modify it, and after looking at many others' modifications, came up with our own Workboxes. Simply put the assignments/daily work is put, in order needed to be completed, in a tub/box. I print of a weekly schedule, from an Excel spreadsheet original, and put that on a clipboard which goes in the front of the tub. Each student can then grab their own weekly work agenda and begin working independently. Of course there are times/courses which require my assistance, but that's built into the schedule. When an assignment is completed, the child removes that subject/binder from the tub and places it on our homeschool bookshelf, thus emptying the tub one task at a time. It is a great visual cue that work is indeed being completed and they can see and "end in sight."
Here are our super fancy workboxes:)

The bookshelf where completed work is deposited, albeit, not very neatly!

I have used a planner for myself and the kids' work, but transferring it on Sunday night to the spreadsheet keeps it all rather neat and orderly. It also gives them ownership of their assignments. Our first day back was not great, but I really think it was a much due to the fact that we had taken such a long break, as it was the work itself. More importantly, it was the first time in forever that we completed all of our assignments! Every single one of them! Today was much better and Jack completed much of his work in a timely manner and without complaint. Yeah!!! Time will of course tell how it really plays out, but I'm hopeful:)

Christmas 2011

2011-12-29T18:48:00.003-06:00

We had a wonderful Christmas - visiting here and in Memphis. So much fun to hang out with all of our cousins and grands!
Making Xmas cookies with Poppy:)

Jack's new Kepi hat - a gift from the Cauler side of the fam:)

Xmas eve at the Simpson grandparents.

Cousins modeling their new hats! Precious girls!

Jack recieved a camo-Jags t-shirt! Score!

The boy cousins opening their special boxes from Poppy - handcrafted with love:)

Will chillin' in the bean bag.

Ryan waiting his turn.

There are some videos I'll post on youtube - since Jeff only shot video on Xmas morning there are no stills:( Sorry!

Stitches

2011-12-08T15:12:00.001-06:00

Well, we almost made it a whole year without someone needing stitches! Oh well! This morning Will and Jack were playing and somehow(?????) Will fell face down on the floor and split open his chin. We have hardwood floors, over a concrete slab foundation, so there's little give if one takes a spill here.

After concurring that he would need to be seen by a Dr., we all had to get dressed! The poor boy sat on my bed holding his chin with a wet washcloth, while the rest of us scrambled to put clothes on and brush our teeth!

He was so good and brave and patient! Thankfully our local medical clinic could see us us quickly. He only cried when they used the lidocain to numb up the area - a needle of course had to be used and it was uncomfortable to say the least! He really was amazing though!

I had him laughing and being silly while we waited for the area to become totally numb. We were blessed to have a Fellowship member as our PA - she was great:) When she came back in to stitch him up, he became really anxious. But, I cannot express enough how calm he was after she got everything underway. He kept his eyes closed the whole time:) I held his hands and just stroked his little head. She was super efficient and after getting 3 stitches we were ready to go.

He looks like he's got three really dark whiskers:) Afterwards, we all headed to Chick-fil-a for some lunch. Because we were in such a rush to get him to the doctor, we never got Will dressed, so he was still in his jammies. As we got out of the car to head into the restaurant, Will asked me if it was illegal to eat there in your pj's!

Here's our brave boy after munching on some chicken:) The dr's office also gave him a "prescription" for a free TCBY treat! So after lunch we ran over there and he got a cup of cake batter yogurt (sounds gross, but really wasn't too bad!) and some fun toppings - his picks:gummie bears, m&m's, and sprinkles!
We were all whooped by this time so we headed home for naps. I'll post some more pics tomorrow after we take off the bandaid.

Toddlers, and Preschoolers, and Tweeners, Oh My!

2011-12-06T15:22:00.000-06:00

Parenting has been really challenging lately. So much so that this lil' ole blog of mine has taken the back, back seat. I wanted desperately to stay up on this and keep family posted on the kids etc. it just seems that most days I am barely keeping my head above water. I know that this is only a season - it just feels like it may last FOREVER:) I don't want to sound negative, and most days there is some laughter amid the tears, but geez louise, I'm in the fetal position crying "uncle" - enough's enough! So here's the catch up in photos...

Some of us have been trying new fashion ideas...

Ella-Kathryn and I joined our friends H and M in Tulsa to celebrate H's birthday...

The boys are all about wrestling with Daddy - every day, everywhere, all day long!

Back in early Nov. we had fun with leaf piles:)

We had a wonderful visit with some great friends here from GA - the boys' mom and I were in grad school together!

This past weekend we enjoyed Jack and Ella-Kathryn's choir concert. No pics of Jack though - there is some video, but he's not very happy about the whole thing so I thought I'd leave well enough alone:)

Last night we headed to downtown Rogers for the Christmas parade. Daddy rode the BCSO motorcycle so we braved the freezing cold temps (27 degrees when we arrived at 6) to cheer him on. While we had a great time and the kids filled their candy bags, we did leave early since most of us were losing feeling in our toes and fingers!

Sorry for the scary shot of yours truly:) It's really hard to take a picture facing yourself while wearing mittens!

Also back in Nov we were able to attend the annual Christmas Toy extravaganza - here in Wal-mart land the vendors break out the latest and greatest toys to show off for the upcoming holiday season. There were some fun giveaways and Ella-Kathryn had her pic taken with "Barbie" again:) The little boys were able to see Mater, Lightning, and Fin, although not as up close and personal as originally planned. Apparently court was still in session at the County Courthouse and since the cars were parked right at the bottom of the courthouse stairs, they couldn't start the engines/honk horns etc:( Oh well- knowing Will he would've hated all that noise anyway!

So, we are looking forward to Christmas here and in Memphis. Lots to do between now and then and still trying to keep up with school, so we'll see how I do keeping this updated as well!

Food for Thought

2011-09-28T11:03:00.000-05:00

Extra! Extra! Read all about it!
http://www.nytimes.com/2011/09/25/opinion/sunday/dont-delay-your-kindergartners-start.html

I'm linking to this article because I found it so interesting! Our public school system has applied Aug. 1 as the cutoff date for entering kindergartners. As such, if we had remained in the system, Will would not begin school until he was about to turn 6. So according to this article/research, we would be doing him a disservice in "red-shirting" him. Ah, more parental angst - as if I don't have enough to worry about! I'll tuck this one aside for our future (if we ever return to public school and/or discussions with our friends who are headed into kindergarten) but for the time beginning it was a very thought provoking read. I am also reading Nurture Shock by Po Bronson and Ashley Merriman - stunning new scientific research/studies which debunk many of our commonly held parenting beliefs. Some have been not too shocking, as in kids getting more sleep perform better and have better overall attitudes, but reading about one study including 4th and 6th graders and the difference 30 minutes of "real" sleep can make - truly amazing! Some of the other chapters, like the one dealing with lying, has given me new insight into handling this issue in our own home. So, just some food for thought:)

The Big 4!

2011-09-17T14:19:00.000-05:00

This little boy turned 4! Jeff and I filled his room and his bunk with balloons the night before so he woke up to a decorated room:) We heard Will and Jack playing with them bright and early thurs. morning! Then he got to have a birthday cupcake for breakfast - always a fun treat. We did a family breakfast and then had the grandparents over for a cookout and campfire that night. He really enjoyed his day and was blessed to receive lots of fun gifts! I know I sound like a broken record, but I really cannot believe that this boy is 4! I was reminded by a friends comment on facebook that the day before he was born I had taken a bumpy school bus ride with Jack's kindergarten class to attend a field trip to the county fair. We also had a picnic at a local park and then walked over a mile back to the school. Her comment was "I remember the bumpy bus ride that triggered your labor!" Ha! I had forgotten, but it's so true:) I awoke around 5:00 the next morning (a Sat) realizing that my water had broken. Hours later our sweet William Charles was born. Here are some things about Will:
*he has such a grateful heart! He always thanks us for even the simplest of things, which in turn reminds us to have thankful hearts!
*He is really funny - he always makes us laugh, everyday, and it's often not because he was trying to be funny - he just has a way of saying things that crack us up
*He LOVES his siblings - he's really bonding with Jack lately, has always adored his sister, and is finding his groove as a big brother. He was recently teaching Ryan to read one of the early-reader books he's learned
*He has the most adorable run - seriously, he's got the most determined look on his face and the wackiest way of swinging his arms - let's hope he can out grow this:)
*He has come a LONG way in terms of his temper and outbursts and demonstrates a contrite heart pretty quickly when he's been corrected. Can't wait to see what God has in store for this very Willful little man:)

On Fri we were invited to check out a local cave with some other homeschool families. Originally Jeff was going to hang out with Ryan, but at the last minute he found out he had to attend a class at work, so I ending up bringing all 4. About half way into the tour, in a cave where you literally are not allowed to touch ANYTHING, I said to another mom, "I really should have my head examined for bringing a 2 year old here!" When all was said and done though, they all did a great job and Ryan was fantastic! This was after the tour - notice Will and Jack's identical 'smiles'!

Will recieved a headlamp from Poppy and during the campfire Will had his on so of course Ryan had to have one too! Thank goodness Jack let him borrow his or else the whole neighborhood would have heard about it:) He was making such funny faces trying to get it adjusted just right on his forehead!

Earlier in the day Jeff set up his new tree stand and of course everyone had to have a turn. Here's Ryan making another one of his famous silly faces:)

I keep forgetting to post about this too. About a month ago we took down the crib. Ryan and Ella-Kathryn sleep together in her bed quite comfortably so I just couldn't see keeping the crib up, taking up so much space in their room, when he wasn't even using it anymore. But I had to take one more picture of him in it before it went up in the attic. It was really hard to take it apart, knowing that there would not be any more babies sleeping in it. I hope to keep it for our kids to use when they have children of their own, or to put up when we keep our grandkids! I shed a few tears but tried to keep a positive attitude. I know there are many great adventures ahead of us, without a little baby, and I am enjoying the kids where there at now. I just know that I am one of those women who will never be done having babies:( Other moms are able to confidently say, that's it, I know I'm finished - not me! Jeff, on the other had, can say it with gusto!

September

2011-09-02T22:18:00.000-05:00

Ah, Colorado, how I miss you!!!Jeff and I had an amazing trip - not just the uninterrupted conversations and freedom to eat only a soft pretzel for dinner if we so chose, but also the beauty of the state. I can definitely see a place for our family there someday:)

We've been back to school for a couple of weeks now and honestly it's been challenging; more so than last year when we were just trying to figure the whole thing out! Ryan is certainly in a very high maintenance season right now:) He is demanding, angry, bossy and so often frustrated by his own inability to communicate what he wants, that he takes it out on all of us! The blessing in all of this is that God has SO been working on my heart - in a huge way. The Holy Spirit is seriously keeping my mouth shut and my heart open. I have been much more patient and kind with my children. It is NOT working any miracles with my children, other than I know that I am not operating out of anger which was manifesting because I felt out of control! Once God laid it out, that I am not a puppeteer of my kids, it clicked. Loving discipleship of my children is my job! Not being a dictator demanding certain behaviors regardless of their hearts and personalities. So, in my quiet time I've been working on my personal mission statement (it's been great for me to clarify my roles and how I want to live those out) as well as spending time praying and reading the bible. Finding scripture that helps me define who I am at this stage in my life has opened my eyes to God's purpose for me! Let me tell you what a big deal this is for me. All of my life I have struggled to feel significant and like I mattered. Obviously getting married and having children brought some of that into focus, but at the end of the day it only mattered in terms of who He designed me to be. His plan for me is the ONLY thing that can give me a lasting, real value.

OK, so enough of the heavy stuff;) Here are some funnies I wanted to record for posterity:

*Will didn't want me to cut up his waffle, but the piece was still pretty big and I asked him how he was going to eat it. He replied, "with my big mouth!"

*Ryan will ask where something/one is and when he gets the answer he'll respond "Oh yeah" or if he asks for something and it's all gone he'll say 'Oh man"

*For some reason there has been a bit of talk around here about dating??? I've been trying to explain what Jeff and I expect about that time in their lives etc. So Will was asking when he could date and I was reiterating our answers. He then said that he could go on date when he got married (I'm guessing b/c Jeff and I say we go on dates?) and Jack pipes up, "Well yeah that's b/c you'll have your own woman!" What in the world???? So Will says "Duh" which I am really not sure where that came from and I tell him "your silly" and he shoots back, "no I'm not, I'm Will!"

That's all she wrote...

August

2011-08-18T17:28:00.000-05:00

The end of July and the month of August are busy, busy for us! Starting with my bday, we then have my Ryan's, my mil's, Jeff's, Ella-Kathryn's, and then my dad's! This year of course we missed Ryan's actual bday-day, but I don't think he minded at all since he was being spoiled rotten by Poppy, LaLa, and Gran who were in charge while Jeff and I were out in CO.
The good news in Ryan's little life is that we've been ear-infection free since June! We switched to Almond milk and have been going to the Chiropractor regularly. Whether or not it's those things or just his age, I don't care! As long as we can NOT get another one of those dang things, I'm thrilled;) So now that Ryan's 2 here's the low down:
He LOVES his daddy! More than any of the other kids, he is quite attached to daddy and for that I'm grateful:) Now don't get me wrong, he's still a momma's boy, but he really does want to go wherever Jeff goes and asks after him constantly. His go-to answer for just about anything is "no" but we're working on that! He sleeps through the night, in Sissy's bed - it works for us and she thinks it's fun, for now. I'm sure we only have another year or so, so we're enjoying it while it lasts. He still really likes music and will bee-bop to almost anything. We haven't had our 2-year checkup yet, but I'll post that after we go in Sept.

This little girl is now 7! Honestly, I know I say this after every birthday, but I simply cannot believe another year has passed! What in the world?? Ella-Kathryn continues to be encourager, our cheerleader, but we can now add drama-queen to the mix! She certainly has mastered the eye roll and smirk (don't know where she learned those:)) and she can sigh with the best of them! She can be so tender with ther brothers, but watch out if you try to do it your way as opposed to hers! She officially accepted Christ earlier in the summer, but we're still waiting on daddy to work up the courage to baptize her:) She continues to be a great student and we're excited to see what this school year will brings. She is so social, loves her friends and family, but is also content to play on her own. She such a blessing to me especially, not just as my only girl, but also because she loves to play teacher/mommy to the littles. She will set up a "pre-school" for them while I'm working with Jack or doing house stuff! Love her sweet spirit!

This little man started AWANA for the first time last night! He is also signed up for choir, so after a family meal at the church at 5, he goes to choir at 5:30, then on to Cubbies at 6:30 and we're not finished until 8. It's a long, late night, but with only a few tears last night, he enjoyed it immensely! He's already practiced his first verse 20 times today! He was so excited and really so proud of himself - we are proud too; it's a big achievement for him to participate in both things and while I'm in the building all night (I'm standing in as secretary for the club )and did have to dive under the desk twice so he wouldn't see me, hopefully, as he gets better acclimated I won't have to resort to such ridiculous tactics!
Here's the parting shot: Jeff and I, self-portrait, atop Mt. Evans, one of CO's fourteeners. CO was such a special trip for us. Yes a child-free vacay was amazing, but it was just such a sweet time to be together, to have entire conversations - uninterrupted! It was great for our marriage and while we both missed the kids terribly, we both wish we could do this annually! Ha!

Home Educating Family Publishing

2011-07-11T13:29:00.000-05:00

Home Educating Family Publishing

ENT

2011-06-29T15:22:00.000-05:00

Well, our visit to the ENT confirmed what we already thought. Ryan could stand to get some tubes in his ears. He's had 5 ear infections in 6+ months - that's just too much for any little one to handle. Our biggest concern for him is that all of the time he spends on antibiotics will only make those drugs less effective, not to mention the discomfort these infections cause him until the medicine kicks in. So, while the procedure isn't scheduled yet, we are looking in that direction. He was so good at the Dr.'s office:) Even Dr. Lee commented on how well-behaved he was and how well he listened to my/his instructions. When the dr. wanted Ryan up on the exam chair, I set him on the seat and then as Dr. Lee wanted to check his ears etc, I told Ryan to turn this way or that, open his mouth etc. He did it all and with no complaint! Now before I get to prideful, I'll be the first to admit this is the same kid who tells me 'No' when I tell him to sit down on the couch;) But it was a nice morning for he and I (Jeff stayed home with the others) and it's always nice when your kids are well-behaved!
We're off to the pool now, and we'll keep you posted when we make the appointment.

Summertime, Summertime, Sum, Sum, Summertime...

2011-06-26T15:55:00.000-05:00

We are cookin' here in AR! It has been super hot the past couple of days, but we're staying cool at the pool. I take the kids almost everyday and so far we've had a great time. The two little kids were spending most of their time in the baby pool, but lately they've wanted to head to the big pool. It's more work for me, just physically holding onto Ryan and making sure Will doesn't drown, but they love it and it keeps us busy. We've taken a break from school for the whole month, but plan to resume in July. Then we'll break again for 2 weeks in Aug. when Jeff and I get to take our first real solo vacation! We've never been apart from the kids for more than a weekend, so this is a big deal for me especially. I'm super excited, a bit anxious too, but mainly thrilled to get that time with Jeff.
Today we celebrate 12 years of marriage - I'm so blessed to have a partner who really loves me and our family. We are both looking forward to that time away from the kids to just be together:) Yes, we'll miss the kids, but I know more than anything it will be a great time to enjoy "us" - the reason we got married in the first place:)
We did some celebrating last week when Ella-Kathryn prayed and accepted Christ as her Lord and Savior! She had prayed about it before, but this was a definitive choice:) She is waiting for her daddy to gather up his muster to baptise her, as he did her older brother. Jeff is not a fan of big crowds and our church is huge so this event is always a big deal for him, in more than one way. We'll keep you posted!
Jack is figuring out what it means to be "accountable" in terms of his relationship to God and us. He had another incident with a weapon that warranted some pretty tough discipline. He's handling it well, but it's just another reminder of how our walk with the Lord can be challenging some times. There is no shortage of teachable moments around here!
Ryan is headed in to the ENT this week - just a consultation at this point, but with the number of ear infections he's had in the past few months, it's a necessary next step. Hopefully, he'll outgrow these infections, but if not soon, then the tubes will be needed.
Will, oh Will. That boy keeps me on my toes! When he was sick a couple of weeks ago he got into the habit of coming into our bed when he woke up in the middle of the night. Fast forward to this past week, he's healthy and still wandering in each night. So, we've resorted to bribery, again. If he can stay in his bed for 5 nights in a row, he can earn his $3 wal-mart watch - something he's been asking for for months. It's perched atop the fridge right now and he's already got 3 nights under his belt:) The down side is that in place of his midnight bed switches, he's now stalling bedtime with rather dramatic antics, endless questions, and hunger pains. We've countered with pre-bed snacks, a list of 5questions to be asked prior to getting into bed, and the threat of a spank if he calls out. Oh my! Hopefully this is short-lived, cause I for one am exhausted!
So, here's a photo dump:

We headed to the Tulsa Zoo (coupons, love coupons:)) taking advantage of the cool late spring weather we had last month.

Our monkeys:)

The boy who walked most of the zoo -just cause he could! Here's his homage to Michael Jordan.

Oh how these 4 fill my heart, hands, home, prayers, car, and deplete my groceries faster than I can blink!

Our first harvest from the new garden! We're turning out squash and zucchini at a good clip, but not much else just yet. I did pluck one small red tomato from the potted plant, and the one in the garden is taking over the yard!

Ella-Kathryn really wanted some goggles and a snorkel, so Papa passed her some dough and off to Wal-Mart we went! She was happy to find the pink ones she remembered and has burned through some laps with her new gear.

Yesterday, 100 degrees was just too hot for me to take them anywhere, so she crafted and came up with her own variation on the headset mic! She also made earmuffs and a headband:)

Well, I'm headed out to drop off Jack for a sleepover, and then home with the other 3. After posted about not feeling the 'rest' part of the Sabbath, I've made a concerted effort to do as much work as possible on Sat. so my Sunday is more restful. To that end, Taco Soup is in the crock pot, and my book is calling to me! Which reminds me I've got to post on my book list. I've been on a reading hot streak - on my 13th in 3 months. Don't know why I do this to myself ; stay up late reading and then make Jack take the littles into his room to play in the morning so I can sleep a bit more:) Can't wait til he's old enough to really babysit!

June????

2011-06-06T22:45:00.000-05:00

I really have slacked with this blog. It was intended to be a place to record our lives, our children's moments during their growing up years, and even our journey homeschooling. Alas, it's become yet another thing to check off my never-ending list. I'm don't feel badly about it at all, I'm just sayin':)
So, where are we? We are on break from school for the month of June, to resume in July. Unfortunately, Jack has not completed his math curriculum for 3rd grade, so he's still plugging away at that. Multiplication really sent his brain into a tailspin. Many tears were shed. Some blood may have also been shed. Not mine. That's all I'm sayin' about that.
He is a truly wonderful boy though. He loves his family fiercely - it's amazing. He is very sensitive, an emotion that can quickly get out of his control and become mere drama or manipulation. We're working on that. It's been hard for that woodsman to stay out of the tick/snake/whatever else is yucky woods right now. He's been forbidden to go beyond our yard since the critters are closing in on us. Thank goodness we have a the cats to keep the snakes at bay, nevermind the many cups of cat food I place on the perimeter of our yard each night to entice more to join our kitty army. I kid. Or do I? I really hate snakes. Yes I said hate, the outlawed word in our house, because daggumit, hate is the only word that correctly defines my feelings toward those evil serpents. Nuff said.
Ella-Kathryn finished her gymnastics class but due to a horrible case of sassiness, has not been allowed to renroll. She was given ample opportunity to turn that frown upside down, but did not and even added an eyeroll upon hearing that her failed attempts to have some self-control over her facial expressions resulted in her losing her gymnastics priveledge. We really are the meanest parents ever! Ha! Thankfully, we've seen some progress over the past week - she can be so stinking dear and loving. But I do fear that there is a hormonal teenager lurking beneath the surface. We'll keep on a prayin'!
Will, oh Will. Where do I begin. His tantrums have subsided significantly, yeah for us, but his ambivalence towards Ryan hasn't changed. In one moment he is so dearly showing Ryan how to do something or sharing something with him and the in the next he's pinching the living snot out of him (nod to Tim Hawkins with the living snot.) Bedtime is much improved, and while most nights he does still wake up at least once, if he manages to climb in bed with us, I can usually put him back in his own bed without protest. He is the most verbally grateful child I know, repeatedly thanking us for the most mundane of things (a scoop of sherbert) to the biggest (Jeff returning his cash to him, long forgotten by Jeff, borrowed back in the fall to pay for a camp site when we were caught off-guard not being able to pay by debit card). He thanked daddy for 8 days straight "for giving me back my cash!" He also promply asked to be taken to "wal-Mark" to buy his very own tackle box. After which he then thanked be for days on end for "taking me to wal-mark to buy my tackle box!" He makes me laugh EVERY day - no lie. Mostly it's his turn of phrase, or rather butchering of phrase or words - i.e. 'target' for 'poptart.' I deserve mommy of the year for my ability to decipher Will-ese:)
Then there's Ryan. Our little linebacker:) He worked his way through this third ear infection only to have 4 teeth coming through. AT THE SAME TIME!!! Poor kid - cannot catch a break. He still loves music and we are proud to announce that the first song he ever sung is Katy Perry's "Firework" (or at least I think that's what it's called.)

So enjoy that and maybe I can finish this post tomorrow...

Oh my goodness!

2011-05-15T21:53:00.000-05:00

I just cannot seem to get my act together enough to hit this blog like I should. With that said, we have been very busy, for us that is. Our family tends to be rather inward focused - we homeschool, don't do too many playdates, and most days eat all 3 meals together. It works for us, but that also means that we really think through activities that will take us outside of our home - geez am I making us sound like hermits?? We're not! Since it's been a while since my last post here's an update:

Jack:
Last month Jack worked diligently to get his pine car ready for the AWANA derby. He and Jeff spent some time working out the design Jack had drawn up and then Jack sanded, painted etc. to personalize his car. It looked great and after a heated competition, he won first prize! We were so proud of him!

I'm trying to edit together the footage we shot that day down into one clip, but until then here he is with his trophy and car.
He and Ella-Kathryn also got to participate in a kid's fishing tournament last weekend. Jeff took off with those two around 7:45 last Sat. morning and they didn't get home until4! Long day, but they had a great time and Ella-Kathryn took 3rd prize for her age group!

Here she is in her Bass Master's fishing hat and free t-shirt. Her goody-bag included a ton of fishing gear - tackle etc. for which she now needs her own tackle box! Again, I've got some clips that need editing so I'll post that later.
Both she and Jack had their spring choir concert tonight. They both did very well - Ella-Kathryn got to do the motions with a little scarf for the first song - something she was very excited about. It really was precious to see her between her two friend Camille and Cadence! They are all such sweet girls and God has really blessed her with their friendships. Jack's choir did a whole performance and he did have one verse to say. I am pleased to report that he was not nearly as goofy as he was during the Christmas one and he was given sunglasses meant for a boy this time! Overall, it was a fun experience for both kiddos.
Ella-Kathryn as finally chosen an activity! After a free class last month, she decided that she wanted to try gymnastics. We found a great place in Bentonville - smaller than some of the very large gyms around town, and a bit less expensive. She has a blast every Thursday night. I am continually amazed by her innate self-confidence and her terrific sense of humor. She is one of the older girls in her beginners class and she literally has no background knowledge in this area. Yet, each time she goes and is introduced to a new skill, she gives it her all and if she messes up, she simply laughs at herself, shrugs it off, and tries again! For someone who was painfully shy and horrible self-conscious, it is truly overwhelming for this mamma to witness such self-assured-ness in my one and only daughter!
I am trying to reinstate my morning quiet time and while it is great to get a few minutes start on the kids in the morning, more often than not, I am joined by my Will after only about 15 minutes. Oh well! I ask the Lord to bless those few moments alone with Him and then I try to enjoy my time with Will. I do often try to set him to another task, reading or drawing, so that I can finish up my time. However, I have noticed that if he and I can sneak in a bit of time at the beginning of the day, he too has a better day. He has really been struggling lately, hitting and hurting his siblings, angry outbursts, screaming fits, and while this morning time is not the silver bullet, it certainly plays in nicely with our overall plan for getting this boy back on track!
Ryan is, as always, such a delight. Even when he's exercising his lungs at full upper range, he really is a hoot and it's fun to see him growing into an active and wild toddler! He loves to be outside, which can be a bit challenging at times, and will ask to have his shoes on just in case he might sneak out the door:) On nicer days we've all been heading out to do school outside that way Ryan can be where he wants to be, but we're not sacrificing our day's work. We ventured out to the new splash park in B'ville last week - basically a concrete pad out of which water shoots at various angles upwards etc. The kids had a great time and it was perfect for Ry as he could walk all over the place and I didn't have to worry about him being "in" the water just yet! He got really brave after the first half hour and started putting his face right over the holes - his face when the water shot out...priceless! I did get some pics on my phone but Jeff's going to have to show me how to download them:( I am a techno idiot.
I'm trying to plan out our next school year - I've got most of our curriculum here, I just need to map it all out so I can see where the gaps are. I still need some kind of art instruction book. Art is not my strong suit. Ar History, yes, but the technical side, not so much! I am sooooo excited for Crystal Bridges to be opening in the fall and have already asked Jeff if we can forgo eating for a month so that we can get a family membership! That request was not well received:)
Ok, enough for now - my bed is calling my name...

Here We Are - Over Here, Amid The Pile of Life:)

2011-04-20T15:56:00.000-05:00

This is what we look like these days...

The many faces of Ryan:

The many faces of Will:

And the other two turkeys who live here:

So, yes we're alive and well for the most part:) Ryan does have a double ear infection. More to come on that little trip down candy lane...

Finally!

2011-04-08T20:38:00.000-05:00

Hooray for Ryan, who at 20 months, finally walked! He's been using the bubble-mower outside lately, and was making great progress. Then today, he was walking with the mower, spotted Pip the cat and decided the cat was too good to pass up. As the cat lazily walked away from Ryan, Ry let go of the mower and just walked on towards Pip! It was amazing! I still am in awe of these little people and how God allows them to do so much in those first years. Truly awesome - His creation, from my womb, walking:) Sorry, a bit philosophical I know, but hey, he's my last, I can be awed if I want to be!
So, we posted it on youtube, but i'm embedding it here as well.

Whooped

2011-03-26T20:59:00.000-05:00

Ugh, another post with no pictures. Boo. Hiss. Oh, wait. I'm booing myself:( Oh well. I am sorry - and I've not anything spectacular to excuse the lack of photos. We've been busy, but with what??? This past week was the local schools' spring break, so we took full advantage of having all of our friends available for play! We met at the park one day, other days at friends' homes, and yet another here with friends. I got to visit with my sweet girlfriends too - 2 during the day and even one night out. It was wonderful but by Thurs. I remembered something very important about my family. We love our friends and we love to spend time in relationship with these dear families. Yet, we need rest. We did manage to do school most days and then we did skip one, but by Fri. we were all whooped.
Jack was having a friend spend the night, but a turn of events resulted in our "returning" our friend. Jack made some major mistakes. All is fine now-trust will have to be regained, as well as some privileges. I am being purposefully vague here. The older Jack gets, the more I desire to respect his privacy - his right to make mistakes safely under our roof where he can be loved and trained without fear of having these errors becoming labels that follow him forever.
That being said, all of the children went to bed without protest and slept well til morning. The busyness finally caught up with me as well and thanks to my amazing husband, I slept til 10!!! He poked his head in to make sure I was ok and I finally dragged myself out of bed:) We did stay up past 11 last night, but I really think it had all just worn me out - not to mention the crazy weather does a number on my sinuses. So, I am praying that I'll be able to sleep tonight! Oh well - just so long as I'm back on schedule for Mon. we'll be ok.
Today was a great rainy, lazy day. I am still in my pj's and clearly never left the house. We all ate all 3 meals here and while I did a bit of cleaning, overall not much was accomplished. And it felt great! This is what a Sabbath should be:) I'm wondering if our family shouldn't adopt the Jewish tradition. It would vastly ease my guilt over not being able to honor Sunday as our Sabbath. Something to think about.
Ryan is finally, and thankfully, over his ear infection but that second molar has not quite broken through. His overall attitude is much improved:) He still won't walk more than a few steps, but we are finding him standing on his own randomly in the middle of the room:) And have I mentioned what a JOY it is to finally have a child who goes to sleep on his own? Ah-ma-zing!!!! Praise God for small favors!
Will is really changing - his language is getting so clear and his expressions are a trip. "Yeah, I had that on my brain," when told what we were having for lunch.
Ella-Kathryn is going through a bit of a phase, at least we hope it's a phase! She's struggling to have a joyful heart when asked to do things, and has developed a rather sassy 'tude. Again, I'm trying to discern if it's a matter of attention, as she's my lone girl and usually so quick to do the right thing with little prompting, or if it's the age (6) where she needs to set some more independence? We'll see. Overall she is still such a hambone, entertaining us with her silly faces and goofy expressions.
Jack is such a good kid. I mean really. When you're in the thick of it, this parenting thing, it can be so easy to lose sight of your kids hearts while you're furiously focusing on the behaviors. It's a daily struggle to step back and after seeking Him first, view these precious children as the gifts that they are! Yes they are human and yes they will err, but these kids of mine are truly fun, bright, enjoyable little people and I am trying to see what He sees:)

Bullets

2011-03-16T13:59:00.000-05:00

Here's our life in bulleted format:

An elderly woman, whose husband is suffering from Althimers and who had recently lost her job, won the $1,000,000 Publisher's Clearing House sweepstakes. The local section of the paper had a photo and I was telling the kids how lovely it was to see someone who really needed that money win! Ella-Kathryn responded, "Wow, that's almost as good as winning a tent!" (her name was drawn at a church function in the fall and she won a tent.)
I told will he looked cool. He told me he wasn't cool, he was awesome.
At dinner one night, Will quietly said, while shaking his head, "Daddy, you so, so good." We kind of smiled at each other, and then I asked him what was daddy good at. He replied, "Daddy, you so so good at breakfast."
Discussing Lent and fasting from soemthing that means a great deal to you, Jack got a panicked look on his face and said, "are you going to give me up?"
While on a shopping trip with EK, she was reading all of the signs and store names. She asked if we could go to the RackRoom and when I told her no, she asked, "well how about the Shoe Det" by which she meant the Shoe Dept (phonetics, gotta love 'em)
And in a huge Praise - Ryan has been sleeping through the night-in his crib!!
Ryan is still recovering from an ear infection (been on antibiotics for about a week and I'm not convinced it's doing its job)
Homeschool is going great - I am so grateful that we can do this even on the hard days:)
Ella-Kathryn made me a sign for my door that says "mommy is butiful" - I tried to take it in the best way possible even if she did draw me with a horrific pig nose
I know I'm insane, but I have baby fever - again...on a trip to the hospital to visit a young friend of ours, I was truly saddened that they had curtained the nursery for the night. Maybe it was for the best though. On the phone this morning, Jack told Jeff that I wanted another baby and I could hear Jeff laughing from across the room:)

Ok that's it for now and I need to get some pics on here too, so I'll try to work on that!

ryan dancing, not dancinc - or why I can't type with a baby on the computer desk

2011-02-20T15:15:00.000-06:00

This kid loves to dance:)

Ryan Dancinc from melanie simpson on Vimeo.

Restless

2011-02-09T10:19:00.000-06:00

These were taken 2 hours ago. There's more now. Tons more. Well, maybe not tons, but we now have a total of 2 feet. And it's still coming down.

I am feeling uber-restless. I hate my use of the word "uber." But there it is. I pace back and forth between the front and back doors. Looking for signs that someone miraculously forged a path in the road. Jeff had to get a ride home in the county truck. Even with studded snow tires, he couldn't get out of the parking lot. It took them and hour and a half to get home. Normally he's home in 30 min or less. The front of the truck acted like a snow plow pushing the snow up over the hood instead of off to the side. No hope for my minivan I suppose. I remind myself to be content. Roaring fire. Snacks. A meal or two. But I wanted to make cookies and I don't have enough butter. So now I really want cookies. See how that works. Just like my children. If it's out of reach, I want it even more. I'm praying now that I can turn this day around. Long for Him instead of cookies. Yearn for and crave His sweetness. Stop pacing and just be still and know that He is God.

Road Trip

2011-01-31T13:07:00.000-06:00

I've been on a road trip this morning. When I got up this morning, I didn't know I'd be hitting the road. That's just the nature of this life right now - everyday brings a new adventure. As I was still warm and cozy in my bed with the littlest little, I heard Will yelling for Jack. Now this is a no-no. We do not under any circumstance yell to wake up our brother. He knows this, but apparently had a lapse of remembering how not pleasant mommy can be when a rule is broken so early in the blankety-blank morning. I SHHHHHHSHHHHd from my room across the house, cause it was simply too early to get up, and also I'm lazy. That seemed to do the trick. For a minute. Then there was a little face in my face. I dragged him up into my bed, ignoring his complaints of not wanting to go back to sleep. Tough boogies. Try. Cause I'm kind like that. Finally after another 30 minutes of baby feet in my back and toddler breath in my face I gave up the fight. I'll sleep some other year. From there it all went downhill. Fast. Faster than my IQ since having children. All I can do on days like these is buckle up my seat belt and pray. I've been on this trip before, this road trip to hell. That's where we are right now. Ryan has only not screamed about one thing today and that was grapes (that sentence was possibly the worst constructed thing I've ever written:)) Will is finally turning into a human being - he too had a bad case of the screamies and the hitties and the pushies and some other made up wordies. EK really hasn't been too bad other than complaining about wanting to live at the beach since we're about to get dumped on - 4-10inches of snow????? Ice too. Jack woke up whining - I'm not kidding. The first thing out of his mouth was "my head hurts," to which I promptly replied, "if I had a head like that it'd hurt too." See above about my unending kindness. The rest of the morning was like watching the instant replay on the ref's cam at a football game. Rewind. See the same thing again. Rewind. Watch. The kids had a megadose of anti-mommy medicine last night. They are invincible to my sighs and eyerolls today. bad news for me. I'm too tired to actually apply any discipline other than threats that sound something like, "if you keep doing that, you'll never have another piece of candy ever in your life ever." Effective, I know.
So I tip my hat to Rodney Atkins who wrote my theme song for this day:
If you're going through hell, keep on going
don't slow down, if you're scared don't show it
you might get out before the devil even knows you're there

Catch you on the flip side peeps.

Winner Winner Chicken Dinner

2011-01-28T22:19:00.000-06:00

Tonight was Jack's first Bible Quiz. After months of practice, we are pleased to announce that Jack and his teammate H won first place for their book/division!

AWANA has been amazing for our kids. It's pretty rigorous, if you want it to be, but the scripture memorization is amazing. This time of preparation for the quiz was harder on me, I'm sure, since I'm so stinkin' competitive. But Jack is as laid back as his dad, so it no big thing to him. At least that's what he said up until tonight. Then, as we were discussing how he was feeling about the "competition," he started saying it made him feel like he had to pee!? What a goofball! Thankfully, he hit the restroom before the quiz began, so all was well. We did get a laugh as we pulled into the parking lot and looked back at Jack to wish him luck one more time and noticed that the lollipop he had just eaten had turned his entire mouth and lips blue! Ha!

You can kind of see the remnants of his blue mouth here - he rinsed his mouth while in the restroom to take care of the aforementioned nerves:)

Poor Jeff spent the majority of the time corralling the littles - but it was a fun time and a great experience for Jack. We're proud of his effort and hope that he'll push himself even harder next time!

Varmints On My Porch

2011-01-27T21:19:00.000-06:00

There is a dead squirrel on my back porch. Courtesy of Ashley, formerly known as Angel, now known as John the Baptist, or perhaps Judas. The story goes like this: there once was a kitten that hid under the Bronco's hood. I was suckered by the kids into feeding it. It is super wild and only after months of feeding it did it ever let us near it, not that anyone other than Ella-Kathryn was really all that hot to hold it. During the really cold nights recently, I did feel rather badly for this kitten, even though he/she had fattened up quite nicely due to our apparent inability to not feed it too much. Nightly, I would open the back door, it would start to run then turn back looking longingly to the warm house. This game would continue for at least 30 min, it would come right to the door, meow, rub against the door, I would try to coax it in and then it would back off. Finally one night I won and managed to grab it and promptly through it in the garage with Pip our other stray/tame cat that adopted us (cause we are too stupid to stop feeding stray animals - side note, Jeff has requested that he be omitted from the stupid group since he told us not to EVER feed it.) The bad news is that Pip is male and we just weren't sure what the new cat was. Not that we don't know how to find these things out people! It's just that wild and hardly stands being picked up at all let alone inspected. So, we find ourselves now with this cat which I'm afraid is pregnant or will soon become pregnant if I don't quit putting the da** thing in the garage with an unfixed boy cat!
Side note (again) - while in Memphis after xmas, our neighbor was caring for Hap and my friend M was coming over to care for the cats and fish. Apparently at the last feeding before we came home, the back door was not latched all the way and when my neighbor brought Hap back the day we were due home, she found the door open, but since nothing else was out of whack, she assumed it just was never locked. As she was leaving though, she did notice that the fish bowl was surrounded by water. Odd, no? With no other clues as to what had happened, she just cleaned it up, fed him and left. Well, when we got home later that day, Jeff had jumped in the shower, and I was unpacking. We had been home a good 30 minutes when Chewie started barking at this skirted table I have near the front door. I walk over and barely see something darkish behind the fabric and start freaking out thinking there's a stinkin' mouse or something in the house. Well, no. It was Ashley, formerly known as Angel, now known as John the Baptist or Judas. Good gravy! That cat had been in the house for who knows how long and that certainly explained the water around the fish bowl:)
OK, back today. Jack comes running in to tell us he nearly had a heart attack. Ho Hum. No parental freak out over that drama. He then tells us there's a dead squirrel by daddy's police car. Of course we all have to trek out to the see the dead critter and sure enough it's a squirrel and it's dead, it's throat having been ripped out surely did the trick. Yuck. Fast forward a couple of hours, we're at the dinner table, with my back to the back doors I notice something out of the corner of my eye. Wished to St. Patrick that I hadn't. The squirrel killer thought that since we hadn't adequately thanked her for her gift, she needed to bring it right on up to the door and then toss it around a bit. Dinner and a show! Jeff reminded me that cats often do this to delight their owners - oh yes, can you sense my delight? We all stood at the back door and applauded her efforts hoping to convince her to take her prize elsewhere. No go. Then I opened the door and told it how appreciative we were of her hunting prowess and that we were assured that we would never starve with her around. Still no budging. Oh well. After a deerless hunting season, we felt good that at least one member of our family could take care of business. The only good news out of all of this it that it finally got itself in a contorted enough position for us to verify that indeed she is not a she, rather a he! Praise God! No kittens - thank you very much. Hence the name change. EK wanted John, which became John the Baptist because of his wildness, but after his refusal to remove the gift, I'm seriously considering Judas. I mean is the food that I serve you not good enough????

Birthday - Man vs. Food

2011-01-22T18:56:00.000-06:00

We've really gotten into the show "Man vs. Food." Adam, the host, travels around trying out the favorite local dives that serve huge portions or weird combinations of foods. It's a fun show for the whole family and Adam is a trip! So, for Jack's birthday party we decided to do a Man vs. Food party. We grilled up some hot dogs and then served the fixings for super spicy chili dogs (all toppings optional of course:)) Then, rather than cake, we made a ginormous ice cream sundae, served up huge portions, and then let the kids eat it without a spoon! (thanks for that idea K!) The boys really had fun, while the girls outright refused to not use a spoon! Ah, the differences between the sexes;)
Here are some pics of the great day. Jack is truly blessed with some great friends and all of the Simpsons were able to come too! Thanks to all for such a fun time!

Happy 9th Birthday Jack!

2011-01-17T16:35:00.000-06:00

The day you were born. I was, quite literally, in awe. Of you, of your birth, of our new family, of the amazing blessing of your life.

Proud daddy! Oh, how young Jeff looks:)

Your first birthday - in our first home on Brompton Ln.

Your 3rd birthday.

4th - from left, Zachary, Madeline, Ella-Kathryn, you, and Noah.

7th

8th

Sadly, I couldn't find the 2nd, 5th, or 6th - there around here somewhere! Today has been quite a day too - I forgot to use the bigger cake pans while baking your cake - cake burnt on the bottom of the oven making the house smoky for about 6 hours! Ryan decided 30 minutes was long enough for a nap, when 2 hours is the norm, and then you fell and busted open your knee while riding you bike! Oh my - the goodness is that you got to go hunt with your dad this morning and we're having your favorite chicken pot pie for dinner, followed by that chocolate cake that I managed to piece back together with an ungodly amount of vanilla buttercream frosting:)
Jack, you are 9 today! Amazing!

You love the Lord and are seeking Him daily.
You love everything about God's creation - the animals, the woods, the ocean, all of it.
You are a great big brother.
You love your friends too.
You love your family - such a sweet, tender way that you want to be with your family most of all!
You're a deep thinker, especially when it comes to theology. Sometimes too deep for mommy - I need to go to seminary just to help you wade through your walk:)
You love candy and sweets (come by it honestly too.)
You are a great help around the house and are becoming an asset to daddy as you learn more about cars, yardwork, woodchopping and more!
While reading still isn't your "thing" you do love a good story and enjoy our read-alouds.
Your doing great in math!
You have quite a knife collection going and while it makes mommy nervous sometimes, you've been very responsible with them.
You have an awesome artistic streak - can't wait to see how it develops as you continue drawing and painting.
You're a dreamer:)

There's so much more to you sweet Jack! Daddy and I love you so much and are in awe of who you are becoming as a young boy. It's been fun watching you grow these past 9 years and we can't wait to see what's in store for you this one! Happy birthday Jack!

H to the Holy, S to the Spirit - or as I like to call it my cheer for the HS

2011-01-10T13:24:00.000-06:00

I'm sitting in a quiet house. Yes, it's my house:) Ryan is napping and the other three are outside enjoying our dusting of snow. They truly delight in even the tiniest evidence of that white stuff! I am enjoying a cozy fire, full belly, and the moments of peace. As I was washing the lunch dishes, I was thinking about Ann's post, from www.aholyexperience.com. She is one of my favorite bloggers, primarily because she exudes a quality that most often eludes me: peace. She is soft-spoken, but speaks boldly. She homeschools her 6 (I think it's only 6) with a calm that always seems right beyond my reach. I realize that I'm setting her up on a pedestal, but I'm ok with that (although as you get to know her through her writing, you would soon realize that it would make her most uncomfortable!) So, she often posts about scripture memorization, having a quiet spirit, and making prayer intentional throughout the day. UGH! I am already running smack into the wall of failure. Which then brought to mind the message from Sunday; in John 14, Christ tells his disciples that he will be leaving soon, but that he is giving them a counselor, or helper. Ooh. Ooh. I want one of those! Our choice for Christ allows us access to this advocate and friend. Praise be to God:) Furthermore, my decision for salvation, I am allowed to go to heaven. In my decision for submission, heaven comes to me: "if anyone loves him, he will obey my teaching. My Father will love him, and we will come to him and make our home in him." John 14:23. How wonderful is that? So here's my teeny tiny hurdle: myself. Stinks right? I mean I can't get away from myself...well legally nor without heavy narcotics. But I digress - shocker. So as I'm standing at the sink, I'm thinking about every single stinkin' day when I arise with the very best, most heartfelt intentions of being calm, patient, quiet, slow-to-anger, quick-to-praise, joyful, grateful, etc. All of the things which should be outflow of my unabated love for Him and what he's done for me. Honestly, there are some days where I think I do pretty well. I fall into bed and smile smugly thinking "hey, today wasn't so bad. I didn't yell (alot) and I made sure to tell each kiddo how they rocked something or other." And then it hit me. As I'm scrubbing the cast iron skillet, really having to use some elbow grease, I've missed it again. I've made myself the star of the day. Not my heavenly Father who dwells within. Not the Holy Spirit who is my heaven-sent helper in the obedience department. Not Christ Jesus himself, whose wounds still gape from my sin. In this New Year I've made no resolutions, only cried out to Him that he would show me abundant grace as I lean heavily on the Holy Spirit and really scrub off those nasty stains of pride, anger, ungratefulness, unbelief, et al:) Three cheers for my counselor and friend the Holy Spirit!

Xmas 2010

2010-12-25T07:57:00.000-06:00

Christmas Eve

Ryan found his ball as soon before the other kids came out of their rooms!

Jack's new bike from Poppy!

Will's new bike.

That face!

Ella-Kathryn's very own bible - we had her name embossed on the cover.

Ella-Kathryn's jewelry box - hand-crafted by Poppy. Upon opening, Jack exclaimed, "Poppy made that? He should get a job at Lowes!"

Will got his very own army gear and Cars scooter. We had to remind Will within the first minutes of opening his army stuff that his older brother has shared his for years, so it would only be appropriate to share...

"Emily and I are twins!" Ella-Kathryn said about her Hello Kitty scooter:)

The boys were up at 5:40! Jeff corralled them in their room til Ella-Kathryn and got up. As Jeff just said, "I feel like I could just go into a coma." Ha! He had to work the church til after 9, then had to get the bikes (one was stored in our neighbors garage and the other in the attic,) and then we watched Christmas Vacation. I looked at the clock last night at 10:40 and declared it was time for bed! Unfortunately, Will got up 2 or 3 times during the night and Ryan got up once. The grownups in this house are too pooped to party! Oh well - we'll gut through. Jeff's making some breakfast and we'll chill here til after lunch when we join the other Simpsons down in Fayetteville.

When I asked Will whose birthday it is today he replied, "mine!" I'm sure it feels that way:) The big kids reminded him that it's Jesus' bday and hopefully we'll have some quiet time later to talk about His gift again. Merry Christmas!!!!

xmas card out-takes

2010-12-17T21:34:00.000-06:00

This last one is hands down my favorite. And pretty much sums up the level and intensity of emotion and drama that occurs betwixt our 4 walls every day. In spite of it all, I would not change one thing:)

We did get one decent shot - it's in the mail!

That Holiday Feeling

2010-12-11T21:48:00.000-06:00

We've been keeping it pretty low-key around here this Christmas. Only one parade, one concert, and so far no actual xmas cookies, just plain ol' yummy chocolate chip:) Jeff normally rides the Sheriff's dept. motorcyle in several Christmas parades, but this year he opted to just do one, and then found out that they had enough guys for the bikes so he just drove the truck. Nice for him since it was a balmy 36 degrees that night. I bundled up the kids and we got there just in time to get a great parking and watching spot - easy in and easy out and right near the beginning of the parade so we could skedaddle asap after seeing the finale. The kids did great - little complaining and they were so excited about grabbing up as much candy as they could that they barely noticed the cold.

Here's our corner spot. Jack and EK had little camp chairs and a couple of blankets. The little boys shared the jog stroller til Will decided he wanted to hang out with the bigs.

After the first couple of floats passed, I felt bad because Ryan couldn't see a thing from his seat in the stroller. This kid weighs a ton! But, he seemed to enjoy the lights and music. At least he never cried:) I do know now though that Will does not care for the loudness of the high school marching bands, the sirens from the fire trucks, nor the scary man dressed up as the Grinch who pointed right at Will shook his head. During each of these floats he slowly took one step after another backwards away from the curb! Never took his eyes off the float/band, but kept moving back. When the fire truck went by, I turned my head for one second, looked back to the place where he had been standing, and he was gone! He had gone completely behind the stroller! Poor kid.

Between My Fingers

2010-11-27T21:01:00.000-06:00

Is there not something in us that wants to grab life, literally, and rub it between our fingers? To know that it's real and tangible. When love passes from one person to another, we look around for someone else to nod there heads in agreement. No, you are not mistaken. That did just happen. You witnessed love. In this crazy life we lead right now, it is too easy to miss those times. Between the siblings bickering over whose air was being touched (no I'm not kidding, they really did fight about air,) and the rushing around to feed 6 people and 4 pets (no I didn't miscount, there is a new stray that decided that we looked like ginormous suckers, and we are) it is far too easy to blink. And miss it. Or more likely, to be distracted and miss it. I have been making a concerted effort to spend a bit of time each day with each child. This seemed like such a novel idea at first. We're home most days, all day long, so it shouldn't be too hard, right? Well, again between meal-making, home-schooling, and life-sharing it is a bit challenging. But oh so rewarding. Jack responds immediately to a small kindness in words and hugs. Ella-Kathryn wants to share her giggles about the newest book she's reading, or hatch a plan for some fun day together. Will, oh Will, is about the most complex little 3 year old I've ever met. So silly in one minute and spewing hateful words in the next. Every morning I find a new wrinkle around my eyes and new grays in my hair. Because of that boy, I'm sure. And Ryan. Oh my. If we meet somewhere and you call my name and I don't respond, please know it's not because I'm ignoring you. I've merely gone deaf. In both ears. Because there is a small boy in my life right now whose lungs were apparently not at all damaged or weakened by his stay in the NICU (and we are truly grateful for that although some minor damage might not have been frowned upon.) Whew that one has a temper too. Have not one iota of a clue as to which parent passed on the angry gene.
To recap:
I am trying.
They have noticed and responded kindly.
With His grace we will keep on keepin' on.

Some turkey day shots.

Not sure what this face is. This was Thanksgiving morning. He got himself dressed, Mr. Preppy:) He's helping me make puppy chow. That stuff is manna from heaven thank you very much.

On the way to Thanksgiving dinner. 2 out of 4 napping.

This picture just makes me laugh. Jack looks particularly thrilled to be there. I will say that he was enjoying himself up until the moment I said "everyone look at mommy!" To which he responded, "
a picture at Lowes?????" Will was making another odd face. Ryan is doing "cheese" and Ella-Kathryn makes me think that perhaps 1 out of my 4 children might turn out normal.

Ah, the annual placing of the star on the Christmas tree tradition. Will's turn this year and I cropped my double chin right on out of this shot:)

Hope you and yours had a wonderful Thanksgiving. I missed my dad, sis, and extended family dearly! But I ate myself into a starch-induced coma and then after shopping from 12:30 AM til 2 AM Fri morning, I went to bed last night at 9 and because I married the dearest man ever, slept til 9 this morning. Yes you read that right - I slept for 12 hours people! Sadly other than some random tidying around the house, I have nothing to show for that amazing amount of sleep. Perhaps I'll be able to regale you with a tale of horrific insomnia tonight though...

PS**** A funny to end on. We have never said that Mr. Claus was real. We would always just ask our kids what they thought and then reiterate how the tradition started. We figured no harm done in letting them figure it out themselves etc. So, at Thanksgiving dinner, I guess Santa became the topic of conversation at the kids' table. Not sure of the details, but we heard Jack say something about it and thought it wise to call him into the dining room to remind him that not all of the children there were aware of the 'truth' of Santa. Thank goodness we did, because we were told then that our oldest nephew may still believe it and definitely the younger nieces did. Whew. Close call. So Jack was cool with keeping it under wraps and promised to scurry in and tell Ella-Kathryn (who decided for sure this year that is was a nice "story, but not real") to keep it on the DL about St. Nick. But before he turned to relay the message to his sis, in a moment of preciousness that we will never forget, Jack glanced over at Jeff, then looked at his Grandma and said with a toss of his head in her direction, "Do they know?"

2 Parter

2010-11-24T08:22:00.000-06:00

We had a busy day yesterday. Nothing in particular, just busy. Good busy. Then after naps, I loaded up the kids and we went over to K's house to visit with her and M came too with her daughter. The kids acted like kids, meaning we had to stop talking every 3.4 minutes to redirect. Even the big kids:) But I so enjoyed that time. Right before the craziness of the "holiday" season. Just a couple of hours to check in with each other and be reminded that these women love God, their families, and miracle of all miracles, me!
A bit after 5 we were getting our stuff together to head home. K's parents were stopping by to drop a few things off and it happened that they arrived as we were leaving. We all hugged and visited for a minute. Then we got in the car and decided to run into Allen's to grab a few things for an easy dinner. We got a spot right in front - the store is in a strip mall so there are some spots that face the front of the building and aren't really out in the parking lot. We were on the very end, but there were cars parked the rest of the way down to the store. We got our stuff, the kids were great, Max gave them lollipops, and then a young man pushed the cart out for us. Ryan was in the cart, the other 3 were walking a bit ahead of me. A bit. We passed the first 5 or 6 cars parked before ours. I noticed that the car that was parked next to us was gone. I saw Will start to run towards our car. I saw him run in between the parked car and the cement parking stop. I saw him illuminated by headlights. I screamed. I ran. I grabbed him up and hugged him. Hard. I said thank you Jesus over and over.
The man driving the car said he saw him. His wife did too. They were very kind. Thank God they were driving slowly.
Later, after dinner and after Jeff had gotten up, I was in my closet getting changed for bed. It was if I had been punched in the stomach. It all just hit me. K's mom. Alive. Delivering homemade cinnamon rolls. K and I talking about her parent's anniversary. M's parents coming for Thanksgiving. Hugging K's mom. K getting to talk to her mom on the phone. Will almost getting hit by a car. I stood there and sobbed. The can't catch your breath kind of cry. Doubled over, but trying to be quiet cry. There was no one moment of conscious thought: "I miss my mom." Rather, it was like swimming the wrong way all day in a Rip current only to finally succumb out of sheer exhaustion, to be pulled under completely. And it feels kinda good. The letting go. Just to not have to fight it anymore. The good news is that it passes. The bad news is that I know it will come again.
This is not meant to be a post of sadness. Instead, it's a reminder that losing someone we love will bring about an entire spectrum of emotion for which we don't have words. It's joy in the life that we got to live with them. It's disbelief that they're gone. It's an aching for the years that stretch ahead without them. It's hope that we'll see them again.

Laughter

2010-11-22T14:55:00.000-06:00

*******Pause the music at the bottom first...

Not Forgetting

2010-11-21T22:07:00.000-06:00

I was going to label this post "Remembering" but really is much more appropriate to say that I just don't want to forget! Here are some of those things:

While playing with his buddy J, Jack had a chance to witness to him. J's questions involved not being sure if he believed in God since he couldn't see him, and not understanding how Christ really could have risen after 3 days. Wow! Great questions and while Jack admitted he struggled to convey what he thought were the answers, I couldn't have been prouder that he stepped up and tried to help walk his friend through those difficult areas of faith. This prompted some good discussion with Jack and has put me on a path to find some material on apologetics for kids. (Any help would be greatly appreciated!)
Will & I were in the restroom at church this morning, and after I helped him go, it was my turn. Normally I make the boys turn around if we have to share a stall or whatever, but we were running late and I just forgot. So as I stand up to get myself put back together he asks me "mom, do you have a penis?" Ha! I explained that only boys have penises, to which he replied "so just me, daddy, and Jack?" I added "and Ryan" and he parried "not you and sissy!" Smart kid, no?
Ryan said "La La" for the first time tonight while skyping Aunt La La!
Ella-Kathryn said she was scared and concerned that when she turned 7 people (by which I'm sure she meant her brothers) would come into her room and make it messy and that at that time she would always want it to be neat. What in the world???
At one point this afternoon Will called me into his room in a voice that kind of worried me. I ran in and found him standing in his underpants (shocker I know) with a pair of children's scissors in his hand. Now we have little kid scissors and big kid scissors and these were not the little kid ones. I was about to reprimand him when I really looked at his face. He was scared. I asked him what was wrong and he said he had cut his bear (stuffed animal.) I started giving the bear the once over and asked Will where he cut him. He so timidly pointed out the very end of the ribbon that is tied around the bear's neck! Poor boy thought he was in for it! Thankfully that's all that was cut and he was not injured in the process. I did have to remind Jack that he cannot leave the big kid stuff out when we have so many little hands around the house:)
Ryan is doing such a great job of falling asleep on his own! For those of you who know us well, you know this has only happened with one of our other kiddos. We are loving it!
Will wakes up almost every night and wants to get in bed with us. I am usually too tired to fight it, and quite frankly as I look at my sweet Jack who's about to turn 9, I am only too glad to let this little one to climb on in. He does, however, talk and often yell in his sleep which can make for an interesting wake up call. Sadly he has called out "no mommy no" more than once:)
If I could find a Lightening McQueen pocketknife for my 3 year old, I would be his hero forever.
EK and I got to do a bit of shopping on our own last week. She needed some shoes and tights and we really had a good time just the 2 girls. It reminded me of how much more intentional we need to be with a bit of one-on-one time with the kids. She is such a grateful little girl, always thanking us for things/food/clothes/etc.
Oddly, Will is the most thankful child. He is always the first to pipe up and say thank you. So sweet coming from that little person!
The kids have not been in public school in 5 months and even though there are some excruciatingly challenging days, I cannot imagine them being gone for 8+hours a day any time in the near future.
Jack was helping Will get dressed the other day and he was frustrated with Will's unwillingness to put his legs in the right leg holes. Jack hollered, "Use the brains God gave you man!" I have no idea where he may have heard that little gem...

Ok, so those are just few. As I read Building a Foundation for Your Child's Faith, but Dr. Larry Stephens, I have been so convicted in the area of my own lack of self-control. I fly off the handle far too quickly. I am too quick to anger over the silliest of things. This book has helped point me back to the truth that I cannot do this in my own strength and only if I am modeling the Fruits of the Spirit can I ever hope to draw my children close to God. And only in this way can I hope to show them how God loves them with an ever-forgiving, always-loving Father. I'm only half way through, but so far it's been a good read. Off to be now to read another good book, Bloodroot, by Amy Greene.

Escape Artist

2010-11-17T15:59:00.000-06:00

There is a little person in our house who desperately wants to join his siblings outside. When he hears the garage door open, he comes crawling or scooting as fast as he can in an attempt to make it to the door before it's slammed in his face. Bless his heart. He tries! Today, as I was on the phone and the older 3 were outside, I looked over and noticed that Ryan had pulled himself up to standing at the front door. I ran over and took one picture, which led to the others. As I took the first he made his "cheese" face and said "cheee," but i missed it. So of course I had to stay and take the others! It was really cute as he then stayed there knocking on the door, waving, yelling "Jack" and "Hi" and made it perfectly clear that he was not happy to be on this side of that door!

Yes, I did roll up the bottom of his pants after this.

That face!

Cheeeeeeeee! I guess he closes his eyes in anticipation of the flash?

Yeah, these two are just waiting for him to figure out that door!

Thank goodness this particular door is really tight and hard to open. Unfortunately the others are not, so it's only a matter of time...

Fall Blessings

2010-11-16T13:16:00.000-06:00

1. Little one's who eat. A lot. This was a bowl of that homemade minestrone-style soup. He ate 2 full bowls!

2. A little fall banner I picked up on clearance some time back. For a couple of bucks it makes me smile and serves as a reminder to do just what it says!

3. Little boys who have learned how to throw fits. I know I shouldn't classify this as a "blessing" but really it's so cute and we're truly grateful that this little guy is even around to throw fits! During this particular one, Jeff had set him down to go grab something out of another room. Ryan apparently did not approve and crawled over to this rug in front of the kitchen sink, laid his head down, and screamed while alternately yelling da da:)

3. Siblings who really like each other. For the most part these kiddos enjoy life together. Here's Ryan getting a ride in the wagon - I did have to remind Jack to slow down about 50,000 times:)

4. A new deer blind - here's to hoping it's a bountiful season!

5. Kids who enjoy music - in their underpants! I tell you what - this guy seems to be in his skivvies quite a bit. Looking back at pics, we've got several of him in his unmentionables! He was rockin' out to Rock Band. Just wish I had thought to capture it on video too.

Today my friend H is having her 4th so we're praying for her family! She is an amazing mom to 3 already, so I know she's going to rock as a momma of 4:)

Jeff is sleeping now but has to rise earlier than usual to head out for night qualifying (shooting at night.) Praying for a sure and steady hand for him!

Homeschool work is done for the day. Getting ready to put Will down for his nap. Ryan's asleep already, and if I can convince the 2 biggers to head out for a bit, I might get a few minutes to myself:) That would definitely be a blessing to be counted!

A Moment of Silence

2010-11-10T16:35:00.002-06:00

A moment of silence, if you will, for Jeff has sold his beloved Bronco. As his wife I am literally crying over this. He's fine. Sad to have had to make that decision to sell it, but he's not upset like me! I just hate that he's had to give up something he wanted since boyhood. But the key here is that it is just a thing. I am so proud of this man. I am so proud of his example to our children. As we work our way of the debt we've incurred for various reasons, he has chosen to rise above his wants, to put aside what the world says he should rightly have "because he deserves it!" and has chosen to put our family and our future first. But for now, if you will, bow your heads...
Note: I know how ridiculous this sounds in light of Veteran's Day:) To my dad and Jeff's dad, and to our grandfathers before who served with honor and bravery, we thank you!

Blustery Day

2010-11-10T12:41:00.000-06:00

Dear cloudy, windy, November day,
You are too warm for my liking, although I prefer not having to run the heater, so I will take the milder temps for now. Your mostly cloudy day has stirred deep within my soul a desire to eat baked goods. Many, many baked goods. I made a pie to celebrate November's coming - that's how desperate I am for sweets. That and we've been watching Little House on the Prairie, and by golly that Ma makes a mean apple fritter, or so says Pa, which means I really needed to see if I too could make a tasty fritter. According to my children I can:) OK, so back to this Nov. day. You are so windy that it makes my baby boy catch his breath when he's on the swing that he loves so. Will looks ten times more adorable running across the leaf covered yard, his hair swooshed to one side, then swooshed back into his eyes. That reminds me, he needs a haircut. Oops, stay on track. Did I mention that this weather also makes me want to curl up on the couch with and read? Yeah, that doesn't really mesh with 4 children under foot. I made a big pot of soup the other night. It was delicious and you should all try it! I omitted the meat, just used the beans and pasta and it was still very filling. Pasta e Fagioli from http://www.crockpot360.blogspot.com/. Go. Cook. Eat. Then make dessert and eat that too so I don't feel like I'm all alone in my journey towards a diabetic coma.

Baring it all

2010-10-30T20:08:00.000-05:00

I'm a mess these days. I'm not sure how this post is going to go, so please just hang on and know that I'm trying to get it out in some proper fashion. It really goes back to this move. Jeff is not happy here - nothing that will be life or death if we didn't move, but definitely something that is significant enough to make him seek out other jobs and homes. In other words, he wants to go. Sooner rather than later, but is willing to wait until some things are resolved, i.e. employment:) He's dissatisfied with the income that he makes in law enforcement and wants to do better for our family. Admirable, I know. And it would be hugely helpful if he did make more. Not just to our "now" life, but to our "future" life. And, I know that he's not the kind of guy who's going to just throw it all to the wind and risk our family's ability to eat and have shelter. I know that. Or at least I think I do. Here's the problem. I want to support my husband. I want to be that wife who says "heck yeah, let's up and move and go where ever to do whatever." Here's my dirty little secret: I'm not that wife. I feel depressed about this whole thing. Not just that I'm not the wife I thought I was, but even more sadly, in a selfish way that my life is not turning out the way I want it to. I'm happy here, or more than that, this is a "known." I do not like the unknown. There are a bazillion variables that play into our moving that it literally makes me sick to my stomach. I'm weepy and quite frankly not very nice to my husband right now. And part of me doesn't want to be nice. Yuck. I know. When I pull up the real-estate sites for towns in Colorado part of me thinks ok, that's not too bad. What a pretty view of the mountains. What a cute downtown. Then part of me thinks, how on earth are you going to keep the house "show-ready" while your husband sleeps during the day and you homeschool your kids. And don't forget about those dogs you'll have to load up every time someone wants to see the house. That is of course if you can get anyone to look at your house, cause we all know the market sucks right now... and on and on. This back and forth. All the while my heart is crying out to Jesus to please give me some peace about any of it. Oh. I am a mess. When I share these feelings with my husband he hears "I don't want to go." To which he replies, "if you really don't want to go, then of course we won't." But I know. I know that man. He will make due. He will work hard. But he will wonder, "what if we'd gone?" And I know I would too. So here we are. Friends and family, please pray for me. That sounds so selfish, but I really need your prayers. I need a miracle of an intervention right now - a major heart change because this state that I'm in right now is not good. Thank you in advance for you who will step in this gap for me:) I love you dearly!

Visiting

2010-10-26T14:29:00.000-05:00

Three and a half years ago I took a picture in the exact same spot. There were only 4 kiddos then...

Jack, oh my sweet Jack, why do you look so silly in this picture????? Precious Emily, only 6, but looks 7! Case and Will clapping at...themselves?

The awesome swing bridge at Tanyard Creek. They ran up and down several times - Emily is already on her way back up and Case has just made the turn!

My sweet Will! He had to really work hard to keep up with everyone. His little legs were tired out by this point, but not too tired to not run the bridge:) I will remember this expression for the rest of my life.

This is what happens when I try to take an action shot! Ha! Hope it doesn't induce motion sickness:)

The Woelke's came to town for a a quick visit over Emily's fall break. We had a blast, even though there was a bit of sickness that took over the two elder Woelkes, and the kids got along great! We didn't do hardly a thing - just let the kids play and we just visited. Karen and I did manage to steal away with Ryan for a bit of shopping (I still have an Old Navy gift card burning a hole in my pocket thanks to my inlaws!) It was so much fun to just hang out.
On a different note, I was in major PMS mode while they were here. Let me tell you, I never have experienced it in this way before. Well, that is after Ryan was born things changed. TMI perhaps, but I'm telling you, I can TELL when it's a comin'! So can my dear husband:( I had to apologize to him, my sister, and my brother-in-law! UGH! All of those yuck feelings about moving etc. just came out, and not in a constructive, mature way. Snippy, ugly, short, sarcastic - you name it, I was not nice. It is really weird for me to hear these things coming out of my mouth, feeling rather out-of-bodyish, and hearing these words disembodied from me. I swear it's not a cop out - I know that I do have the ability to control this, but it is such a challenge. Next month, I think I am going to have to pray a ton more for self-control and for the Holy Spirit to work in my to just keep my mouth SHUT!!!! Seriously. Maybe I'll take a vow of silence for those couple of days? Cause the way it's been going is not productive, nor is it kind, or pretty, or encouraging, or...you get the picture.
Ok, so moving on. Things I need to remember:
When I was outside with the kids Sunday afternoon, Will, Ella-Kathryn, and Ryan were swinging, having a great time and that's when I noticed. My dear daughter is getting so big! I know, I am a master observer right? Seriously. When did her legs get so long? I remember when she learned how to swing on her own - on that very swing. She was so excited to pump her legs and make the swing go without help from us. Now, she can kick the leaves of the tree in front of the swingset. She swings so high, she makes the whole frame rock. She chatters non stop about anything and everything. She is my only daughter and I cannot hold on to her hard enough! I pray that she will continue to be an encourager, helper, and that she'll hold on to her easy going attitude. Even when she's having a "moment" she is quick to snap out of it and move on. Much more like her daddy, she is even-keeled and has always been our best sleeper! She is a great eater too:) She loves her girlfriends and told me today that she wants to try public school again after we move (we'll see about that one.) She still loves to snuggle and loves to take on the role of teacher for her younger brothers. She's smart as a whip and excels academically. Most importantly, she loves Jesus and wants to be baptized. There are pages more that I could write about her, but I need to get back to teaching! I thank God that He saw fit to bless me with one sweet girl among the 4 crazy boys! Love you EK!

Getting there

2010-10-18T16:23:00.000-05:00

At his 12 month checkup we told our Dr. that this little man was not really talking, crawling, walking, standing, pulling up, just scooting on his bottom while holding his right foot. Fast forward a few days after that appt. and he was babbling up a storm, being intentional in his signs and words, and continued scooting like a crazy little speedster. Then a few weeks after that he started crawling. Then a few weeks after that he started pulling up. Now he's pushing chairs and "walking" with them and is "cruising." While I still have some concerns about the balance (he's got none and cannot stand alone yet) I am thrilled to see him meet all of those other milestones - and here's the thing. It was on his time table, and my dear husband was never worried! That man:) Thank goodness the good Lord saw fit to put us together, cause I know I do enough fretting and fussing for the both of us. So, Ryan will have his 15 month checkup here in a few weeks - yes I did say 15 months!!!!!- and according to Jeff he will be a walking fool by then. I'm not so sure about that, given his complete lack of balance still, but of course you would expect me to say that, wouldn't you?

On a completely different and yet somehow mildly related note (that being that I own all of the crazy in this house) I also told my dear husband that I feel confident that I will never be the victim of a serial killer. Hang on, there's a valid point here. As posted many times before, I love to read, and I am a huge fan of crime fiction. Agatha Christie to Karin Slaughter (yes that's her real name,) if it's got a good plot and great writing, I'm in. Ok, so even if the writings not fantastic I'll probably still read it. Anyway, Jeff prefers ghosts and hauntings (don't get me started on the whole Christian perspective on this, I'm still wading through this topic) and I happily go along with watching Ghost Adventures or some other such show with him, cause I'm telling you, ghosts are not the things that really scare me. Full disclosure - I do believe in Satan and demons, and that does scare the tar out of me. Ok, so here's the thing - what I've learned from my exhaustive reading on the subject of abject depravity in human beings, evil-minded folk, and the law is that those who follow a predictable routine are more in danger than those who don't. Ha! I've got those suckas beat! My children do not allow for such foolishness as routine! Some mornings I'm up at 5, others it's 6:15, some it's 7:45. Nightly dog walks may take place at 8, 9, or perhaps 11:13! Take that serial killers of Bella Vista - you'll never catch me.
I know. Even I feel sorry for my husband.

self-actualization vs. Christ realization

2010-10-13T10:27:00.000-05:00

As I caught up with a blog written by a friend from school long ago, I felt puzzled, perplexed, then just plain dumb. She wrote about Maslow's hierarchy of needs (from the 40's and newly revamped, as she noted had been written about in the Sunday NY Times.) I vaguely remembered this from Psych 101, but had to click on the link she'd provided to familiarize myself with the idea. Basically, there is a hierarchy of needs starting with the basics, food and shelter etc., and ending with the self-actualization level during which we realize our creative and intellectual potential. Problematically then, those who are hungry or without home, cannot function at their highest level of creativity nor intelligence. Anyway, the revamped version puts mate acquisition,mate retention, parenting on the top. Again, problematic, because for those who choose to remain unwed or childless would by definition not be achieving their fullest potential. Now, I've not read through the whole revised version, so if there are points here that are incorrect, by all means let me know. What I did read and my friends post stemming from her reading that article was what caused me to feel sort of, well, stupid. She posited that for her self-actualization and parenting were separate, even disparate states of being. One could not fully be "mother" and "self." To which I found myself saying to the computer screen, "so what?" Perhaps because I view my being "mother" through the lens of my relationship with Christ, there is no true feeling of loss for "self." Yes, sometimes I feel tired and frustrated and need a time-out, a coffee with a friend, or just a few hours to be alone. But, at the end of the day, this dying to self is inherent in loving Christ and desiring to be more like Him, so my being "mother" is just another avenue by which I can travel that road of sanctification. For my single or childless friends I suppose this road would be named something else - perhaps just that the wait for a mate, or child or the knowledge that neither will be in their future. Moreover, I'm not convinced that one necessarily negates the other. Yes there may be limits on both, there are only so many hours in any one's day, but I know many wonderful artists/authors/musicians who are at the same time wonderful parents! Isn't it inherent in becoming a parent the knowledge that you will have to share your time with another human being? Just a thought...
On a completely different note - here are some pics of our camping adventure from last week which may or may not have included the following:
1 child screaming in the middle of the night to the point that said child had to be driven around for 30 minutes so that he would go back to sleep
2 dogs that barked. at everything.
1 raccoon who saw our trash as the gold mine of partially eaten steak and dropped-on-the-ground marshmallows that it was
1 other kid who also woke up in the middle of the night and "couldn't go back to sleep because his tummy hurt and had to pee"
1 other kid who woke up in the middle of the night because his earplug fell out and he absolutely could not go back to sleep without it
1 dog who scratched ALL night long
1 baby who peed through his pjs and onto mommy's sleeping bag, up by her head because he had completely turned himself around in his sleep
2 very tired parents who in the middle of the night swore that they would never go camping again, but one of those parents had much better outlook in the morning after those 3 precious hours of sleep:)

Corn Maze

2010-10-01T09:34:00.001-05:00

We hit the Razorback Corn Maze last night and had a blast. First up was the cow train, which mommy had to ride as well, since it's pretty bumpy and the man in charge was concerned about Will bouncing right out! It was hysterical - me squeezing into the kid-sized "cow" car. My knees and lower back are sore this morning from the constant bumps. But, seeing little Will's smiling face and hearing him say, "this is fun mom!" made it well worth it. Jack and Ella-Kathryn got the 2 front seats, the bumpiest, and it was a hoot watching them rock back and forth like bobble heads along the trail.
Next was the corn cannon - jack and ek did this with some help from dad. Not worth the couple of bucks, in my humble opinion.
Then on to the maze. The kids headed off with their flashlights and I was in charge of the map. Big mistake. I am the navigator who has to turn the map to which ever direction we're headed:) I am famous for giving directions based on trees and pretty bushes in front of "that amazingly restored 50's bungalow with the gorgeous crepe myrtle!" Not helpful when the only shrubbery around is corn! Can you see me in the army - "um, I think we need to go 4, no maybe 5 clicker-ma-bobbers in thataway direction?" Needless to say, we got a tad bit turned around:) Thank goodness for Jeff. We were sorted out in no time and celebrated our success with a romp on the hay bales. We can now check this off our fun fall list. Tomorrow is building of the scarecrow and hopefully I can hold off on buying the pumpkins for another week. I hate when we get them too early and then they rot.
On a more serious note, I had to, amid tears, confess a sin issue to my husband. Gulp. Confession to another person is not my strong suit. To God, no problem. But the face to face always gives me a pit in my stomach. It had to be done. As we talk about the future, a possible move, job changes etc. I fall prey to my greatest weakness: lack of trust. This is less often a lack of trusting God, and more often a lack of trusting my husband. More significantly, it's about not feeling that sense of control that I think I have! I feel better after confessing, but know that the road ahead is filled with prayer and some time in His word, fending off this area of weakness and quite frankly the most intense area of attack from satan. Whew, ok so what a way to start the day! Really it is though, as I know that I am given a clean slate to begin again and I know that I can be changed thanks to Him!

Fall!!!!!

2010-09-30T11:54:00.000-05:00

The air has been off for days now - what a relief! I thought Jeff might go AWOL with the horrid temps we've had this summer (he loathes the heat.) So, it's cool at night and even pretty cool during the day. Tonight we've planned a trip to the corn maze - something the kids look forward to every fall. We're going to try a new one this year since our fave is about 35 min. away and this one is a bit closer and more importantly less expensive:)
Homeschool is plugging along. don't really have much to say about it all right now...
For your comic relief, I present Jack Simpson. Jeff and I have always explained that movies that were rated PG or R are for adults. Only a few days ago did I realize that he has been thinking of this way. As in the conversation with our neighbor the other day: "Ms. Meadows. Do you watch adult movies? My mom and dad do." Oh. My. Gravy!!!!!

My history forgot me!

2010-09-22T21:57:00.000-05:00

What I mean by that is that it's been SO long since my last post that I had to type in the whole name of our blog to pull it up! Usually I just start typing http://www.6/.... and the rest come up. Oh my, my!
So what wondrous adventures have we surely been on that have been taking up all of our time? Nada. Zip. Life my friends. Life at 6,000 mph, give or take a couple of mph:)
Our elderly neighbors have split up, left town separately, and in a hasty barter made by none other than yours truly, we got a new-to-us fridge in exchange for a deep home cleaning to get their house "show" ready. The cleaning really wasn't that bad, but in one ginormous moment of bad mommy judgement, I decided that it would be fine to take all 4 kids over to the vacant house, so that I could get a start on the cleaning. All was fine until Ryan swallowed something. We'll never know what, but after his choking and gagging for 30 minutes we ended up on our way to the ER. In the car he vomited again, so I made a split-second decision and pulled into the Bella Vista EMT/Firehouse. The EMT's were great and they said he seemed fine, but Jeff, who had been in class in Fayetteville and was running lights and sirens up to us, thought an x-ray was in order, just to be sure that there was nothing blocking his bowels or anything. So, we headed to Mercy where he was x-rayed! All was well and while in the ER room, Jack then says, "well, I did see him with some hair on the side of his mouth." Oh my gracious!!!! Now he tells us! To his credit, I had only ever asked him if he saw Ryan actually eat something:)
I managed to get the house clean on Thurs. and Fri. and am glad to have that behind us. We will miss our neighbors and it has proven to be a really good starting point for some discussions about marriage, God's covenant intentions for marriage, and dealing with our kids fears and concerns about their mom and dad.
Jeff is off camping for a couple of days, so I took the kids to AWANA tonight solo. Went great and then on the way home they all went berserko!!! I mean just nuts! They were amped up and hungry and it took forever for them to fall asleep. Crossing my fingers that they sleep in a bit. Ella-Kathryn even lost one of her bottom teeth in the madness:) It was loose -she didn't lose it amid infighting or anything! And, Ryan took an hour nap in the nursery, hence the 10:00 post. Oh well - ce la vie:)

Birthday Fun

2010-09-15T09:01:00.000-05:00

Poppy came to town for Will's 3rd birthday party. We had a blast and managed to fill every moment of every day:) Party shopping, LPGA, George Washington Carver's birth place - you name it, we did it! And here's the proof...

Today is Will's actual birthday, and this morning as I was telling him his birth story, I was truly amazed. God has been so good to us, amid the pain of loss and sadness, there has been so much good. So many blessings. And today we celebrate just one of those!

Happy Birthday Will:)

2010-09-01T15:21:00.000-05:00

It finally rained here !!!! HURRAY!!! Not that it's going to do a thing to help our poor "grass" (in quotation marks because our lawn is really clover and weeds now) or my now dead boxwood:( RIP boxwood - let's see if Lowes will exchange your sad carcass for a fresh new shrub:)
I am in the middle of Oliver De Mille's A Thomas Jefferson Education: Teaching a Generation of Leaders for the 21st Century. Fascinating stuff - and ridiculously motivating, for homeschoolers and public/private schoolers alike. He posits that the classics/mentor model of "education" is really the path to raising up folks who will know how to think as opposed to what/when to think. I'm not yet finished so if there's more to add I'll do so in another post; suffice it to say, I am yet again praying and thinking over how to improve what we're doing here at home. There are truly not enough hours in the day!

All of the kids (well not Ryan) pitch in during meal prep. Here's a perfect example of how we roll in our house! Stripped down to our skivvies to peel a carrot:) This was actually his first time peeling a veggie - he did a great job and his big bro was very complimentary at the dinner table.

As I mentioned in an earlier post, being in such close proximity with the kiddos all day has certainly brought to the surface some sin issues. The children's ministry at our church has been studying the fruits of the spirit. Great teaching for the kids, catchy songs, and a fantastic segue to our home learning, especially since we're around one another so much now! So, I took each "fruit" put it on an index card and then added a magnet to the back, posted them on the fridge in easy reach, and we've been making a point of reminding one another of our fruitful or fruitless spirits! We did this a while back with verses pertaining to behavior and I know my friend H has been doing it with the fruits too. Anyway, I noticed last night that 'goodness' has corner missing.

Turns out Ryan took a bite out of this one last night! Really that about sums up our attitude lately - while we persevere in our desire to learn about our God, sometimes in a family unit, someone just takes a chunk out of our fruit! Thank heavens that He is big enough to mend that hurt or soften our hearts from the anger that caused us to lash out and take the bite in the first place. We forgive one another, pray for peace and a mended relationship and move on. We have learned that more often than not we will sin again, but in those precious moments when we find victory over that sin and we have chosen His way and the fruit is demonstrated - boy howdy, doesn't that call for a celebration! Mommy does a happy dance for self-control and peacefulness (a big victory in this house!) and while my kids may not want me following them around for the rest of their lives doing a victory dance over every little sin that's overcome, they know that their Lord does just that! Hope he's a better dancer than mommy:)

Ho Hum

2010-08-30T17:12:00.000-05:00

We are chugging right along in homeschool, albeit it's a slow, jerky kind of chug. 2 of the new books I ordered already got here, the rest are due today. This, I think, will make our days a bit more organized. I researched the books we would need from the library and hit that today. Check! Bought more milk for my sweet boy who now adores milk. Check! New tire and inner tube for Jack's bike (which as he will kindly inform you or anyone else in a mile vicinity that he's not been able to ride for OVER 8 WEEKS - the horror.)Check! I felt downright productive this morning. And then we came home. And all steam that I thought I had ran clear out of me. If you find it let me know, cause I'm gonna need it. After some soup for lunch I found myself lying down for not one, but two naps. Ok so I really didn't nap, but it was awfully nice to have to lie down with Ryan first and then Will later:) I may, or may not, have kindof sortof dozed during the latter of the two naps. But only for a minute. I swear. So, we regrouped. Circled the wagons. Whatever other turns of phrases you might care to insert here...I got my crap together and we met back up at the table. I with my Diet Dr. Pepper, they with their water, cause no Jack, life is not fair and yes caffeine will stunt your growth (wink, wink nudge, nudge if you see my kid and he asks just agree with his parents on this one, pretty please.) We got through LA, Math, History and a lively discussion on why the Spaniards might knowingly lie about finding cities of gold. Any help with that last one would be greatly appreciated.
Ok, off to drop Jack off at golf, swing by Wal-Mart, pick Jack back up and eat some dinner. I know I'm tired - how 'bout y'all?

Catch Up

2010-08-24T17:00:00.000-05:00

We are into our 3rd week of homeschool and yet again change is in the air. This is sadly a post w/o pics, as I am writing on the fly, headed out to celebrate my sweet friend Kimberly's bday! Yeah for a girls night, but boo for not time left in the day to do this:( Oh well. So here's the low down: I bit the bullet and ordered some books that we really needed to proceed with school. I felt a huge weight lifted once I placed those orders, really knowing that we are doing this. We went with MCP math for both, Truthquest History for both, and then I picked up Learning Language Arts through Literature for EK (I had bought one used for Jack a while back,) and then also got some various books for nature study and science. I'm really amped because this will simplify alot of things for me and hopefully make school a bit smoother for all involved!
Ryan is still scooting around and is starting to try and pull up on things. He is finally drinking his milk so we're completely off formula now! And thank goodness for that - saves us about 20 bucks every week and a half!
He's really doing great eating "real" food - loves pasta, mac-n-cheese, peas, and mango:) I still get tickled when he and Will are in the bath together - I think he might outgrow his big brother sooner rather than later!
Will is still a handful, but our consistency seems to be paying off. He can be quite a pill with his siblings, pinching and hitting when things don't go his way, but he seems to just be so dang frustrated that they won't HEAR him. We'll just keep on fighting the good fight:)
Ella-Kathryn and Jack got to go to Silver Dollar City with their friends and they had a blast! It was such a nice treat for them. Of course it wouldn't be a day if one of the kids didn't make me blush. Apparently, when they were all in the Marvel cave, EK told her friend that it was "cold as hell" in there! All of the kids just stood there, not sure what to do or say, until the friend of the older brother asked Kimberly what they should do about that? She asked do about what, to which the big bro told her what EK had said. Thank goodness my sweet friend can take this kind of think in stride and merely turned to EK and told her that we probably shouldn't say things like that! Of course, EK quickly turned and placed the blame on her big brother saying that Jack had taught her that! Oh dear :)
So, there you have it - another exciting update on our crew! I've got more pics to post, so hopefully I'll find some time tomorrow to get that taken care of.

August Birthdays

2010-08-15T12:52:00.000-05:00

August is chock-ful of birthdays around here. Ryan's is the 5th, my mil's is the 11th, Jeff's the 13th, Ella-Kathryn's the 15th, and my dad's is coming up! So, we do alot of celebrating:) This week alone we've gone out to dinner, hosted a BBQ and then EK's friend party. Whew! But it's been such a sweet time - experiencing the celebration of Ryan's first birthday was truly amazing. As I've said before, looking back to his rocky start makes the birthday all the sweeter. And, my baby girl is 6! Oh man alive - that one is a hard pill to swallow. She wants a sister so bad, and I will NEVER be done having babies, except that my husband is SO done, so we're at a bit of a crossroads. I still have a heart to adopt (no more biologicals for us thanks so modern medicine:)) and Jeff most certainly says no. When explaining this to my daughter, I made the mistake of telling her that only God could change daddy's heart, soften it to the idea of adoption. So, every night now she prays,"Dear God, please soften daddy's heart so we can have a brown baby girl." Oh my goodness - I am hoping God answers this one! But, this will be a great lesson in spiritual discipline (praying,) obedience (for when He gives us an answer,) and understanding (because I don't foresee Jeff's heart changing on this one!)
In the meantime, we are in the throes of some major sin-exposure. Homeschooling and the intimacy of relationship that occurs in this new "all-kids all-the -time" environment has brought to light some glaring heart issues, for them and me! I am trying to embrace this:) God has given us the time together so let's use it well! If that means skipping a math page in favor of addressing the sin, then I'm all for it. But, as you all well know, dealing with sin is rarely easy. Not often is it just, let's sit down and talk about it, read some scripture, pray and ta-da, you're fixed! Tempting to handle it that way, but I've not had success with the hit-it-and-quit method.
So there you are - a quick update of us. The pics are from the parties - Ryan got his cake Fri night - loved it! EK had a great time at her party too:) Sweet girlfriends and thoughtful gifts - hope they stay friends forever!

I'm Full of It

2010-08-08T21:27:00.001-05:00

What in the world is going on with me? Is this the 3rd post in 24 hours? Good gravy y'all. Well, here it is. I"m full of it. Now, now Karen, not that "it". I'm full of, well, Him. There has been this tide of His mercy in my life over the past 2 weeks. Coming home from FL and leading up to homeschooling - in between, conversations of moving, talks with dear friends who will apparently miss me (who knew I was miss-able;) pulls to join or not join a bible study; struggles over discernment for being a godly wife and speaking what I believed to be truth (or did I just want to be right?); fighting my sin of wanting to control my children rather than instruct and lead them; not falling on my knees in humility to ask for grace and direction instead of clawing my way through the day desperate for the rest that only quiet time with His Word can provide; and really just miserable for Him. Looking back over the past few years, it is with wonderment that I can see how He drew me up from the desolate pit out of the miry bog and set my feet upon a rock making my steps secure. He put a new song in my mouth a song of praise to our God.[ Psalm 40:2] It is also heartbreaking to acknowledge that even with this miracle, in my sinfulness I find myself inching back towards that pit. No matter how clearly I see the miry bog and know its darkness, there is in the Christian walk a point of exhaustion I think that comes sometimes in the constantly seeking after Him. A weariness that can be overcome quite efficiently by following that same route - seek after Him. Yet, in that moment of choice, the hole seems so easy. Just step over the edge and fall. And so it is with renewed humility that I hold on to the hem and find myself hanging back over the side of the pit, legs dangling, heaving in the effort to do my share this time so that He didn't have to pull me out entirely on his own strength - ha! That's a good one. As if I somehow helped Him drag me up and over! Nevertheless, here I am. Hope renewed and desperate for Him. The new week holds promise. Fresh starts. Grace and mercy all around! Praying that your week too is full of fresh starts, even if you're no where near a pit:)

Oh Happiness

2010-08-08T16:41:00.006-05:00

*****NOTE: Pause the playlist player at the bottom******
I LOVE this song. I love the David Crowder Band - they're different, thoughtful, inventive, awesome:) My kids are mildly addicted to this song - Jack says they rock out to it at HWY34, which is his "Sunday school." We rock out to it in the car, at home, everywhere! And the "message" is so simple, but amazing - His grace is enough for us, and the whole human race. It's an incredible free gift; one that shouldn't be taken for granted. Hope you enjoy - and hope that it gets stuck in your craw like it does mine!

What Was I thinking...and other questions that will keep me up tonight

2010-08-08T15:55:00.000-05:00

Today was our first official day of homeschool. Ummm. Yeah. So I think the best thing I can say about today is that not one child in our family was harmed, physically, psychologically (at least we won't know on that one til much later in their lives,) or otherwise. One dog was yelled at excessively, but honestly that's really nothing new. I rolled my eyes to the heavens in a dire plea for patience and hope approximately 227 times and that is the exact number of times my prayer was answered, albeit temporarily!
So, we did have some good moments. Jack enjoyed the on-line math, although his joy quickly evaporated when he realized that there were indeed more than 2 problems to the activity. Ella-Kathyrn made us all laugh when in attempting to write the numbers starting at 20 in decreasing order , or as I so poorly explained "backwards," she promptly, in Amelia Bedelia fashion, began "02, 91, 81"etc! Poor girl, she really was quite confused, but once I sat down with her, she breezed right through it:) Will thought today would be the absolute best day ever to not be happy about anything. At all. There was much back and forth from his bed to diffuse the meltdown,s so I know that tomorrow I will need to have more out for him instead of just telling him to go find something to do. Ryan did quite well, scooting about from room to room. His recent mobility has eased his separation anxiety for the most part, while it has increased the need for my attention to him as he has also discovered that lamp cords ease teething pain. Oh dear!
I was up past midnight last night fretting about today. All day I felt on the brink of tears. Yet, at the end of the day, I still believe that this is the right choice for our family.
**********
It is now Sunday afternoon and I need to add on to this post. I prayed every night last week for the Lord's guidance. I truly felt that the way we were doing school was not right for our family. Math was taking too long. I was frustrated trying to meet each child where they were in their lessons etc. Remembering back to when we first started looking into homeschool, I was struck by Charlotte Mason and her methodology. We probably won't do the whole shebang, but pretty close. The main idea is spending more time reading and narrating, rather than doing workbooks, and formal lessons. Establishing good daily habits, memorization, and reading are key components. We will scale back math to 10-20 min. blocks, rather than 30+. This alone will probably save my soul! The kids can draw, play with Legos, or something like that while I read to them, but Will can participate in this too. We're taking a field trip down to the Dickson Street Book Shop, one of my all time favorite haunts in Fayetteville, to gather up some more books. I've been talking this place up all weekend hoping that the kiddos will be excited to go - not sure it's working! Keep your fingers crossed that we can find the rest of the books we need and we'll keep you posted on our progress this week.

One Year

2010-08-06T13:28:00.000-05:00

It's truly amazing what a single year can bring. This time last year we were anxious and worried as our newly born son had been whisked off the NICU after an emergency c-section the night before. Jeff and I were talking about how in some ways it is so difficult to remember sitting next to Ryan's NICU bed day after day, pleading with God for grace and mercy for this child. On the other hand, there are moments when those emotions punch you in the gut. The intensity of the fear and helplessness truly stop you in your tracks, causing you to suck in your breath. We could of have lost him. I asked Jeff, "was it really as serious as I made it you to be? Was I overly concerned?" He said no. In fact we probably will never truly understand just how sick he was - his Dr.'s hardly knew what kind of infection he had. But this story has a happy ending. He is totally fine! As the pics show, healthy and happy. So here's a run down of who Ryan is at the end of his first year:

you still love Praise Baby! And thank goodness for that since it will occupy your attention for a bit while we try to get some things done.
while I don't know your exact weight, you are definitely a healthy boy!
it was difficult for me to not breastfeed you, but there have been some definite pluses to formula - anyone could feed you, and of course see above point:)
in spite of a mother who fretted over every milestone (would there be delays?) you reached each one in your own time, which was pretty much right on track anyway
you hate to be on your tummy - really not a fan - and thus the "scootch" was born: you don't crawl, you scoot in a sitting position, all over the place! You're actually pretty quick too, and it's funny to look down and see you at my feet when you were just in another room:)
you have 2 bottom teeth and the one on top is pretty much in too
you are just now beginning to enjoy chunkier foods - after the great vomiting all over mommy incident of 2010 in Chick-fil-A, this is a great relief!
you enjoy the water - pool, ocean, bath - again, after a period in which you screamed bloody murder anytime you were in the water, this is greatly appreciated and made our summer much more pleasant! You splash and squeal. Even the salt water didn't bother you.
you love your brothers and sister, but aren't afraid to fight back if they annoy you:)
you wear a size 4 diaper and 18mo clothes, although it depends on the fit
you love your dogs and don't mind getting up close and personal with them, letting them lick your hands, face etc. You do mind mommy coming along behind this activity to disinfect you!
you have a ton of hair, have already had 2 haircuts the most recent was the day before you turned one - we cut off all of your curls but I'm certain we'll see them again soon!
you did experience some pretty intense separation anxiety from mommy, but now that you're moving, that seems to have passed - and not a moment too soon!

There is so much more to who you are now, but enough for now. You are loved, and we are grateful for your life!

Lean Into Me

2010-07-27T13:40:00.000-05:00

The Lord did once speak to me in an audible voice. It was clear as day, and startled me right out of my prayer! What an experience! But, it's never really happened again. Usually, it seems that God or the Holy Spirit speaks to me through my never ending inner monologue. It feels like a thought, but I know that it's not of or from me. Make sense? Sometimes it's like there's another person inside my head and that's the voice that I hear - not a real voice (don't worry here, I'm not hearing voices!), but definitely something other than my own thought. Anyway, I remember Karen Kingsbury or Francine Rivers describing it as a whisper on a breeze. That's kind of it - it just sort of passes across my thoughts. God gave me this a couple of days ago. We returned from our vacation (which was great and deserves it own post) I was immediately overwhelmed with the amount of work to be done before we begin homeschool in earnest next week. My heart raced. I felt a panic attack of sorts coming on. The day before we came home I had been reading in Job, not really lifting my spirits I can tell you! But, amid all of that, as I went to bed Sat night, I heard Him. "Lean Into Me." That's it. But wow! I have turned that over and over in my head and heart. Savoring its sweetness. Letting it wash over me in the midst of a baby suffering from extreme separation anxiety and teething, a soon-to-be 3 year old who cannot understand why every toy in the house is not his, a soon-to-be 6 year old who just really wants a horse and a bunny and a baby sister, not to mention the 8 year old who is just really emotional right now, and an already over-worked husband who just took on another part time job (sweet him!). So, here we all are, leaning into Him. And miracle of all miracles, He's holding us up.

Rant

2010-07-05T13:56:00.000-05:00

Ok. Deep breath. So I have lost many of those pesky pregnancy pounds, there are still a few that mistakenly believe I am their mothership and simply will not go back to their home planet Cellulite. Oh well. And, in the name of transparency, which by the way is the same shade of white that is my skin right now, I should mention that my recent diet vacation has consisted of pop-tarts, cheez-its, and Diet Dr. Pepper. I know, Diet Dr. Pepper, why bother. Just go ahead and drink the real deal for cryin' out loud. But I am a product of the 80's where it made total sense to order the Big Mac meal, with a Diet Coke. Cuz I was 13 and thought that 123 pounds and hip bones that jutted out were what made me undateable. Not my inability to carry on a conversation with anyone remotely resembling a boy. But I digress. Sort of. Because my rant today is really a coming full circle kind of thing bringing me back to my deep seeded body issues. Those being: I don't like my body. I know. How original right? But seriously. I wish I were one of those women who could embrace the blue veins and stretch marks as badges of honor for bearing 4 children and blah, blah, blah. But I'm shallow and vain and I want to grab that 13 year old girl by the shoulders and scream in her braced toothed face,"You are thin and while boobless right now, they will come later and be more trouble than they're worth, so just enjoy the fact that you can buy jeans in a single digit size." UGH! Please do not send me comments about this (Karen and Heidi:)) I love my life and this is a passing hell that I'm in. I'm just sayin' - it's my blog and I'll cry if I want to. This manic phase is of course caused by the need to buy a new bathing suit. Yes, I will be entering the first circle of hell in about an hour - a poorly illuminated dressing room in which every wall is in fact a mirror that must be made in Taiwan or some other country where crap is porrly made because there's no way in the Holy Land that I ACTUALLY look like THAT!!!!! Prayer teams should be assembled before we do this to ourselves. Full makeover and spray tan booths should be set up outside of the department stores. Ok, I got it out of my system. I'm ok. But, if you don't hear from me in a day or two, check the Macy's in Joplin where I may still be passed out and in shock.

We're still here!

2010-07-04T21:22:00.000-05:00

Well, if I thought the summer had been zipping by before, then I was sorely mistaken! We are already getting ready for our beach trip - we leave Wed!!! Yikes:) There's much to be done around here but I wanted to throw up a few pictures from VBS and our 4th celebration. The kids really enjoyed VBS despite all of us coming down with whatever funky virus Will brought home from church on Father's Day. The kids each had fevers of 102-103 and about 24 hours of really not feeling great. I got it the following week and then Jeff had an abbreviated version last week. So at least we're well for the trip!
On Sat. I took the kids to our local 4th of July parade (yes it was on the 3rd) and that night I took them out to our fireworks display. I knew I didn't want to tackle the big even in Bentonville, so we opted to forgo the display tonight in favor of the one last night. It rained on us a bit, but never downpoured so we were fine. Will did not like the loudness, but was ok with sitting in the car to watch. Ryan was enthralled for about the first 5 minutes, then he was squirmy:) Oh well - I did it. My poor children were not deprived of a 4th of July fireworks celebration despite their father's crummy work schedule! Will they ever remember these days????
The Bella Vista parade: small, quaint, and just the right speed for Will:) He did something really brave though - he shook Strike's hand! Strike is the most bizarre mascot of the Arkansas Naturals baseball team. I'm talking wierd! I'm not even really sure what the heck he is - he really looks like some kind of neanderthal crossed with a Fraggle Rock character!

Waiting for the fireworks to begin.

Watching the display - note Will's eyes! Not sure if he was in the middle of saying cheese or praying that they would be over soon.

When he started to really get upset I convinced him to watch them from the car. He seemed ok there and at least he didn't really freak out and start screaming or something. I was parked 3 rows from the front and surrounded by cars, so there was really no way out until they were over. Thankfully he just sat there and watched patiently.

This was the final of about 10 shots I tried to get of Ryan! It is so hard holding the camera out at just the right angle to take his picture while I'm holding him! The first 9 he was either looking behind me or was mid turn so he's just a blur:) Oh well - he was there and he never cried!

Here are some pics from VBS - the ones Jeff took inside of their performance did not turn out well. We were so proud of Jack though because all morning he said he didn't want to get up on the stage and we just told him he could decide for himself, but that the hard work he did learning the songs etc. was for that performance. About 10 minutes before they were supposed to go on, he told me he still wasn't sure. Then up he went with this class! Later I asked him about it and he told me his friend B said they had to go! Ha! Good for B and good for Jack!

Jack and Will petting one of the horses from Horses for Healing a great agency which provides therapeutic services for children with a variety of special needs. The VBS was mission minded and collected change every night to then donate to the charity. On Sat. they held a pancake breakfast, tallied the money, and the kids go to see some of the horses. Ella-Kathryn liked to die and go to heaven right there! I had to threaten her life to get her to come back upstairs after 20 minutes of grooming one of the horses:)

The horses are all named things like "Hope," and "Redeemed" - love that!

Ella-Kathryn and two of her BFF's!

Hope you all had a great day and we'll try to keep this updated while we're enjoying family and the surf!

Oh My!

2010-06-24T07:34:00.000-05:00

Good gravy! Is it seriously almost July? Whether it's a visit to the pool, homeschool and playing at home, or just a brief playdate, we have been busy and June is zipping by. Our homeschool time is an abbreviated version of what we'll do when we return from vacation, but it's been interesting to see how this might work. Or not work! I am already noticing things that I'll have to tweak - Jack's math time takes my complete attention. He never did master time telling in that he can look at the clock and tell what time it is, but asking him to rephrase it to explain in relation to the previous hour or coming hour is really difficult for him still. He gets easily frustrated and I am practicing every breathing technique I know to not show my own frustration! It's hard when some bit of understanding or knowledge has become so ingrained that you cannot imagine not knowing it! He also needs to gain some speed in his math facts so that multiplication won't do him in!

Ella-Kathryn is sailing right along but that doesn't mean that she doesn't need me too. I am trying to figure out how to juggle their lessons so that I can be present for each of them. Initially I counted on doing the same subject for each at the same time; however, I am beginning to rethink this in terms of needing one to be "busy" while I instruct the other. I also have been searching for a different History book because a phone call from a friend who will also be homeschooling for the first time prompted me to look more closely at the text I had originally selected. It's flawed and confusing - not good for me or the kids! I can still use it as a backup, but I need a "spine" text - that is the primary one. Jeff's slated to read a sample of one that I found last night, and let me tell you how excited he is about that! The man's only caveat to our opting to homeschool was that he wouldn't be asked to "teach" them anything other than PE and shop:)

The bigguns started VBS this week and have enjoyed it so far. Jack had to miss last night because he was running a fever and when Ella-Kathryn got home she too was hot and didn't feel well. I'm sure they got it from Will who was sick on Sunday. Of course I didn't figure that out until after he had been at church for 2 services! I stepped back into my old volunteer position to help out for the day so the kids had to stay in their classes longer than they have in almost a year. Can't believe it's already been that long! I just shake my head in amazement that Ryan will be 1 in only a couple of months! Anyway, Jack and EK are both better this morning, so I'm hopeful it was truly a 24 thing. That's how Will's seemed to be and I didn't feel great Tues, but was better by Wed. It's like Roulette - round and round she goes, who will get sick, nobody knows:)

Ryan's first trip to the pool! He loved the water and was so cute in the big pool with me. He stuck his booty up and "kicked" his legs like he was swimming the Butterfly. Uncle C. would be so proud!

The VBS theme this year is Saddle Up and this was her first project a horse hat. Last night she came home with a stick horse - can't wait to see what tonight brings!

OK, so I think that brings us up to speed around here!

Treasure Found

2010-06-17T15:21:00.001-05:00

I took the kids over to Compton Gardens and the Crystal Bridges walking trail yesterday. Bentonville is doing an amazing job of creating an interconnected series of trails through downtown, the coming soon Crystal Bridges museum, and Memorial park. It was quite hot yesterday, but we needed something to do and I figured most of the trail was in the shade but is also paved so I could push the stroller, so it was a better alternative to some of the trails around us. Anyway, it was really quite beautiful, and the kids enjoyed getting to know the different kinds of flowers and plants as well as seeing how far the construction work has come since Aug (when we were there last.) We even got to see a deer hiding in the trees. Thankfully this one wasn't hurt, unlike our last experience with one! A story for another day...On our way back to the car, the kids were walking on the bike trail which runs parallel to the walking trail, but is certainly more fun to them since it includes tree trunks and huge boulders! At one point Jack excitedly yells to me that he's found an arrowhead. He runs to me and shows me the above photographed flint. I am skeptical, but tell him it's nevertheless a cool find. Fast forward to this morning. We had planned on taking the kids to the Museum of Native American History, another little gem here in Bentonville. The couple who own it have done so with their own money and keep it open at no charge. They recently remodeled it and it's really a very nice and manageable facility. We told Jack to bring his arrowhead with him, in case there was someone there who could help us identify it. We were the first ones there this morning and had the place to ourselves for almost our entire visit - which was nice with the kids! They were amazing by the way - really behaved themselves and had a good time with the learning wands provided. When we first got there, we explained about our find and she said she would call her dad to have him come in and take a look at it. He arrived about 15 minutes later and when he inspected it he confirmed that it was indeed a real Native American arrowhead and astonishingly, it is probably about 10,000 years old! How cool it that! We credit Poppy's eagle-eye training in hunting for shark's teeth:) Needless to say we were all very excited and I told Jack I would get a shadow box to put it in with a little snippet about the story.

The first exhibit is this Mastodon skull - quite impressive! Especially with Jeff's head in the back:) Ella-Kathryn is in trying to blow a bubble for the camera and Will is saying "cheeseburgers!"

This is what Ryan did during his visit to the museum:)

Ella-Kathryn and I loved the beautiful dresses - they were so intricately decorated. Sorry about the flash glow. These rooms were rather dark.

Jack and Ella-Kathryn using the learning wands.

Outside there is a huge TeePee/Tipi (i've seen it spelled both ways.)

Summer Vacation...

2010-06-17T14:52:00.000-05:00

Monday our friends T and M came for the day. It was one of those awful summer days where it's sunny for 30 minutes and then storming for 30 minutes. A rather schizophrenic day! So, the kids did their best to stay busy. T and Jack whittled some sticks into very sharp spear things. I know. What mom in her right mind allows boys to make weapons, let alone play with them. Alas, this is what the boys are into right now and they have demonstrated the ability to use the pocket knives safely. So there you have it.

Will made his own fun by eating his candy in the laundry basket:) Our sweet neighbor J is an avid golfer and often comes home with goodie bags filled with treats and fun things like crayons. Having no grands of her own, she has kindly adopted ours and always share these sweet and treats with them!

Ok, this I had to share. Ryan is usually the most pleasant, contented baby. But, and this is a big but, when he's mad, he's really mad! He screams and clenches his fists or squeezes his hands together so tightly I think he'll hurt himself. These are 2 pics of him in hissy fit because no one would get him out of the highchair:)

On Wedensdays Jeff comes home and then naps for a few hours before getting up in an effort to start a "normal" schedule til Sat. night when he goes back on shift. It's really a tough gig, and we try to help him as best we can, but when you miss your daddy, you just plum need to be around him. Poor Jeff was trying to get to bed and the kids just gravitated to the bedroom to be with him. He had put in a movie and as you can see by the "we've become pod people" look in their eyes, they had gotten sucked in too. Except of course where you can see the 2 bigguns noticed that I had a camera and made sure they had on their picture faces:)

P.S. - I told Jeff I woul crop these so that you couldn't tell he was in his "drawers," but when I did it made it look like he was neked. So sorry if these offend anyone, but it looked way worse the other way!

P.S.S. Note Ryan snoozing away - sweet boy was so tired that morning, finally fell asleep while everyone was in there horsing around, and slept on for another hour after this was taken!

Heavy

2010-06-15T14:57:00.000-05:00

Jack has always been the kind of kid who ponders. Thinks deep. Really seems to grapple with some heavy stuff. Then proceeds to throw it back at me in the hopes that I somehow went to seminary in my sleep and am now a theological genius. Um, well, not really son. I did dream that daddy's coworkers came to pick him up for a class and they had parked with their headlights shining in my bedroom window so I woke up and saw a carload of men staring at me which caused me to panic bacause I thought daddy was late for his class which made my heart race and made me wake up for real. But I digress...
so today on the way home from Wal-Mart Jack asks if we can speak in private when we get home. I say sure, but what's it about because maybe we can go ahead and talk now. He says it has to do with God and hate. Oh boy. I say go ahead, let me have it. The short version is that sometimes he feels like on the outside he believes and loves God, but on the inside his heart is hard and dark (yes he used those words) and that he might not love God. Furthermore (no he did not say that word) he was concerned because it felt like it was easier and more fun to not follow God and he was worried that satan was in his heart, not God.
Me - deep breath. Ok, so this is how I responded: Jack, that's perfectly normal. Mommy struggles with this too, feeling like satan is after my heart and boy howdy wouldn't it be easier to not walk with the Lord cause my flesh says ooh yeah, that will taste good, look good, seem good in the here and now. I encouraged him to spend some more time with the Lord every day. Really get to know this God he wants to love and follow. Pray for protection from these spiritual attacks (he's already been baptized so I also explained that this comes with the territory of being a believer, these battles between light and dark for his soul) and I told him that I would put out an SOS to his family and friends to step up their prayers for him. So, please do pray for him. Pray for peace and answers to his questions and that he would grow to feel some level of comfort in this in-between place of belief and doubt. I am sad that he has inherited this doubting Thomas trait from me, but perhaps in examining his faith so early in his life, he can move forward towards a spiritual maturity that I myself have yet to obtain. There's more to be said here, but Ryan is trying to push every button on the keyboard which makes is pretty dang hard to type anything. I'll revisit this in another post.
Oh yeah, and about an hour later he says to me, "Mom, I'm just not understanding what love is. I mean what is it , what does it mean? why do we say I love you to people? " Come on dude! Give me a break. Can't you just pee on the bathroom floor like your little brother. That I can handle. This stuff is going to do me in!

Big brother

2010-06-11T08:32:00.000-05:00

Tuesday was the last day of school for Jack and Ella-Kathryn. As per tradition I picked them up in my decorated-for-summer car: I write welcome to summer vacation on the sides and then on the back , "so long school!" This year, of course, it means so much more to our family. Our decision to homeschool brings some bittersweet thoughts too. Will this be our last, last-day-of-school pickup? Will I be nostalgic for those back-to-school-days of fall? More importantly though, am I really going to do this homeschool thing??? We still feel led to do this, but I'm not gonna lie, there are days when I wonder if I am truly capable of this calling. Much like motherhood, it seems as if there will be days that will be too overwhelming to handle. I know in my heart that these will be days of utter reliance on Him, but could someone please tell that to my head? I will be attending a used homeschool book sale next Sat. and whatever I can't find there I will be purchasing the following week. Anxieties about choosing the "right" math program are plaguing me right now, but again, I am trying to give it over to Him.

Wed was our first official day of summer vacation so we didn't do a dang thing! My sweet girlfriends and I got together for one last hoorah, all of the kids included this time, and we were able to visit and gab for hours, minus all of the time we had to referee, fix boo-boos, and refill water and donuts! K and A have become such good friends and I so enjoy their company. K's daughter C stayed on for some playtime with Ella-Kathryn and when I dropped her off in the afternoon, K blessed us with a meal! It was much appreciated too, since I had been so busy visiting with those ladies I never got around to making a dinner plan!

Thurs. we hung out around the house and Jeff took Jack and Will out and about getting preparations for their fishing trip. I mowed while Ryan took his morning nap and EK listened for him on the monitor - so nice having such big helpers! Then after he woke up, he sat with me outside while I weeded. Except for trying to eat a wood chip, he just enjoyed being outdoors. Such a sweet boy! So Ryan and I are on our own this morning as Jeff has the three bigguns on a fishing expedition. They're hoping to catch some Trout and Walleye (sp?) and I'm just praying they stay safe! I tend to get a bit worried when he takes them out by the water. I know how hard it is to keep track of 3 just around the house, so being out somewhere different tends to bring on all kinds of unnecessary anxiety! Just hope they catch something, but I know the time with their Dad is just as meaningful.

I did manage to snap these pics Wed afternoon. It was about 3:30 and Ryan hadn't had his afternoon nap yet. Jack asked to hold him and I was happy to oblige so that I could gather up everything/one to get C home. The next thing I know, I look over and Ryan had fallen asleep on Jack! It was truly one of the most precious things I've ever seen.

He is such a good big brother and really I feel blessed that for the most part these siblings like each other. I just hope they continue to care for one another and only grow closer as they get older.

Ella-Kathryn really wanted to take a picture of Ryan yesterday. I obliged and this was the pic she got - totally captures his little spirit! Arms outstretched with excitement, and although you can't see them, I can tell you the legs are just as taut and the toes are splayed as if the joy was riding a current from him belly straight out of each toe!

We're almost finished!

2010-06-06T20:06:00.000-05:00

As the last few days of school come and go there have been many parties, field trips, and all around fun! The whole 2nd grade got to head down to the park down the street for a cookout and some time outside. It was HOT, but they had a great time. Jeff helped man the grill for some yummy hotdogs, and after Ryan caught a morning nap, the littles and I met up with them.

Will is doing awesome with potty training! He is pretty much finished, minus a few accidents here and there. Poop is the biggest issue, but he's doing great, just still hesitant:) Here you can see how big his underpants really are - he's just so stinkin' tiny. I can't find any size 2, only 2-3T, so I'll head down to yet another Wal-Mart tomorrow to check them out. Yesterday before the Farmer's Market he was dressing up and Jeff was laughing so hard at his little cowboy. Will walks around saying "When I big, I..." and he fills in whatever activity Jack does like shooting the BB gun, walking in the woods, riding his bike in the street etc. Wish I could convince him not to be in such a hurry to be big.

We got more blueberries at the Farmer's Market, so I made some homemade whipped cream to go with our shortcakes for dessert. Ain't nothin' better than homemade whipped cream and it's so easy. Please don't by the stuff in the tubs! I promise it's easy and soooooo good:) If you don't believe me, these faces should convince you!

After church today we played some more dress-up. Ella-Kathryn put on Jack's old Upward's Bball jersey and later when I told her to get changed since we had to run an errand, she looked up at me and said, "but mom, I'm a Jersey girl." Ha! If only she knew what Jersey girls really looked like:) Will finally fits into Jack's old knight set and thought it was alot of fun. In the second pic, his funny face is because he's saying, "Cheeseburgers!"

Last, but never least, this little man is 10 months old! Whew! Where did that time go? I cannot believe that this time last year, Jack was finished with 1st grade and we were anxiously counting down the weeks til we went to FL. Then, when we got back I went in to my OB b/c I thought I was leaking fluid and bam - Ryan was born!

Clearly, he is none the worse for his trials and while we are still waiting for him to crawl, he is our precious baby boy, full of snorts and laughter. Yes, you read that right, he snorts when he laughs and that sends us into hysterics. Does anyone want me to get some of that homemade whipped cream to put on those cheeks before they take a nibble?

Safari, Cooking Help, and Memorial Day

2010-05-31T13:52:00.000-05:00

Ella-Kathryn's field trip to the Gentry Safari was cancelled 2 weeks ago due to rain. Not sure how the public school system missed that one - I mean anyone could have looked at the radar and noticed the HUGE band of thunderstorms that were headed straight for us! But they didn't, and the poor kids had to load up in the buses and made it half way to the safari before they called it off. I, unfortunately, made it all the way out there, sat in the parking lot for 20 minutes, and then got the call that it was cancelled:( Oh well, we loaded up and tried again that following Monday and it was a beautiful, albeit sweltering, day. I met her out at the safari and then rode on the bus with her through the actual animal part. She was so sweet - happy to see me and she and her friend Camille shared their seat with me.

The kids were a hoot. At one point, we had passed the bison, which one kiddo yelled out "look at the big cows with earrings!" because they had those ear tags on. Then we saw some "bambies" and some monkeys. Then there was a lull in the action at which point some sweet kid hollered, "TURTLE" and every little face leaned over to that side to check out the turtle!

Ella-Kathryn and her friend Camille.

On Saturday these two clowns helped me make dessert for our yummy grilled steak dinner. We mixed up some chocolate pudding then folded in some homemade whipped cream to make faux chocolate mousse. Very sophisticated we are! I think Will's face is the give away as to his favorite part of helping mommy cook!

Memorial Day 2010

Jeff brought home donuts for the kiddos - I did eat one, but immediately felt sick afterwards. That's progress right??? To atone for my sins, I suggested we jog the trail and the kids could ride their bikes. Here's Will and Ella-Kathryn talking to the ducks and geese after the walk. Note Will holding up his drawers - his underpants are too big even though they're 2T-3T. Poor kid is just so stinkin' skinny and I couldn't find anything smaller. He's doing great with the potty, and made his first #2 in the potty last night. Although today he's been very reluctant to try it again. We shall see...

Nice face Jeff! Look at how tall Jack is! Oh my, that boy is growing up sooooo fast.

Love this face! We got called out of church yesterday b/c he was running a low fever and had some green snot:( I gave him ibuprofen and tylenol yesterday and last night, but he did great last night and slept pretty well. He seems fine today, so I'm hoping it was a fluke. I didn't feel all that great yesterday either, so maybe we were just sharing some cooties. He's finally getting a bottom tooth. I'll try to get a pic when it's through a bit more. Still no crawling or pulling up. Trying not to fret over that since he's tracking everything else just fine. He says "dada" and babbles a lot, and he's still such a pleasant boy. Couldn't be more grateful to God for this gift!

This is what jogging, not even running, a mile and half does to my face! Ha! Truth be told, I always get beet red when I exercise. I remember taking different step classes and the instructors would always come over to make sure I was ok! Look at how big his head is compared to mine!!! And those creases on his wrists! And those cheeks! Can you tell I'm smitten????

Hope you all have a wonderful Memorial Day! We are so thankful for all who served in our armed forces - we honor those who died for our freedom and pray for those who are currently serving our great nation!

My Mind's A'Swirlin'

2010-05-24T20:14:00.000-05:00

I have so much swirling around in my head right now. So many posts that I've written while falling asleep. Yet, when I sit down, either I'm interrupted by a little person (kids not dwarfs I'm not drinking that much), or I just can't get it out the way I remember it being in my brain! UGH!
Thus, no posts. At all. Oh yeah, and today was the 2nd anniversary of mom's death. I thought about typing "passing" there, but it always makes it sound like something else - a football pass, passing gas, just passing through. Well, that last one is true. She was just passing through. Our comfort is in knowing that this life was just another leg on her journey. The best was yet to come. Makes me kinda jealous actually. I'd like to think that we were pretty spectacular beings in her life. Alas, I know Jesus trumps all, so I will acquiesce to His greatness and glory. I too am excited about spending the next bit of my life with Him. Although I will continue to believe, deludedly (yes I know that's not a word) or otherwise, that I am a pretty ~~intense~~ amazing influence on those in my life:)

Saturday Night Special

2010-05-15T20:49:00.000-05:00

Like most families, Saturdays are filled with family time of some sort. Today however, Jeff had a motorcycle detail at 10 which meant he had to be out of the house by 9. I got to sleep in til a gloriously wonderful 7:45 - at which time I chose to get up, or else end up tossing and turning til 2 or 3 because yes, my body hates me that much and just that one hour difference in waking up time will cause me to pay on the back end, not falling asleep til probably 11 or so. Anyway, by the time I got up, he had to go ahead and get ready and since he thought he'd be gone til after lunch I knew I'd be on my own this morning. So far this year we've had rain on our Saturdays, making the Farmer's Market a no-go. Today, while it seemed possible that we'd get rained on, the kids and I took our chances and went down to the bvill square hoping for some fresh veggies. We were not disappointed! We snagged a small container of strawberries, which we later discovered are the best we've ever had. Ever! We also got some snow peas which I gobbled all day. There were beautiful lettuces and baby carrots, sweet potatoes that were brought up from the cellars, radishes, onions, and herbs. I had already bought some other veggies at the store so I only got the peas, but it's great to know that we already have so much to choose from.

Our garden has yet to be put in, but it's in the works for this week. I know we'll have to start from plants this time, but since we're keeping it small, I think we'll be ok.
Jeff headed to bed earlier than usual tonight, I think around 4ish. He's had to be in uniform every day of his "weekend" either for court, the church, or today's detail, so he was just tired. Plus he finished putting the plywood in the attic - a nice thing for me so I don't attempt any more stunts and/or ceiling redecorating as I did last year!

So, since daddy was in bed, our dinner consisted of popcorn, Nutella and Fruit wraps, apple slices, and cheese and crackers! Mommy of the year right here people:) Seriously though, this is my favorite way to eat:snack-style. We grazed the treats from 5-8, read the bible together and then prayed together. Can't think of a better way to spend a Saturday night!

We did manage to do a little dancing though. Sat. nights on NPR there's a bluegrass show that always provides us with the best dance music and often some funny lyrics to talk over. I will say that tonight was the first night I caught a cuss word, and unfortunately Jack heard it too. Thankfully, he didn't make a big deal of it and didn't say anything about it, so the others were none the wiser.

So, here's some randomness from our night.

Spin your partner round and round!

You never know what you'll find in my kitchen sink! After many baths involving screams which caused my ears to bleed, I finally got smart and tried the sink. Still screamed. Then tonight, it dawned on me to put his bath mat in the sink so it wouldn't feel so cold. Much improved:) No screaming and he actually splashed and played a bit. Karen, note the pirate eye;)

Homeboy Will kickin it in his Old Navy jammies, brother's tball hat, and freebie National Geographic Kids inflatable globe being used as a soccer ball. Just wait, all the gangsta's in east LA will be throwin' away their piece in favor of the globe.

Ah, precious electronic devices which cause my dear children to disperse into the far corners of my home and become completely oblivious to all activity around them. How do I love thee? Well, I don't mind them a bit actually. There's a time and a place for sure, and we have time limits, no school days etc but quite frankly they enjoy them and so we've allowed them in our home. Here they are catching a few minutes while I got their snack ready. Note Ella-Kathryn's tongue:)

Hope your Saturday was a wacky as ours!

Too Funny

2010-05-12T08:19:00.000-05:00

Saw this on another blog and 'bout spit my coffee on the computer screen! Hope it makes you smile too:)

Rules For Campfire Fun

2010-05-11T09:58:00.000-05:00

I don't know about your family, but round here, when we do up a campfire, we take our pants off. Well, only some of us do. Apparently, he had spilled something on his shorts, and of course, the logical conclusion is: when you get something on your clothes, said item must immediately be removed. Got it? I guess we need to rig up some sort of yard ordinance prohibiting anyone over the age of 3 from following his example. Of course the Sarge could just haul you in if you break the law. Then again, the Sarge has been know to walk around in his skivvies too, so I we're really not setting a good example. Again, I point out a basic difference between men and women. Ladies, when was the last time you did the dishes in your undergarments? Um, never? Of course I also don't rub my belly nor stick my hand down my pants, so there you go.

Back to the campfire: when placed on a blanket with toys, one is to totally ignore the toys in favor of gathering the blanket up until you can reach the nasty tag sewn into the corner of the fabric, which provides endless minutes of chewing enjoyment. This was after Will had to move his plate for the 56th time out of the reach of this little man's hands. Who knew 9 month olds could appreciate nitrite free turkey dogs? And yes, to answer your question, he is a handful.

On a final note, it is always advisable and really just plain desirable to have a cheerleader when learning to use the potty. Look at that smile from big brother. Don't you want to use the potty too? Will's look of sheer determination, or perhaps complete boredom, but whatever. I don't want any comments either about why we don't have a training potty. By glory, we just got around to using toothpicks, we're sure as heck not going to baby them in the bathroom too! So what if you fall in. Just saves me a step later by not having to give you a full bath. I can just whip out a diaper wipe and clean off any other exposed parts.

And this picture blows wide open the myth that only women go to the bathroom in pairs.

Peace out.

Everything's Better With Toothpicks!

2010-05-04T13:55:00.000-05:00

Over the years I had read articles/posts of moms who declared that toothpicks were a sure-fire way to get picky eaters to eat. Not my children, I thought. They will eat their food as presented to them with the proper utensils. Yes, you do correctly note a tone of superiority and downright snootiness. Well, my day of eating at the crow buffet has come. Will has never been a big eater. He will eat, but in smaller portions typically, and if a whole meal is set before him, then much coaxing and threatening will ensue. So, for lunch today I decided I has nothing to lose, excpet perhaps one of his eyes via impalement from said toothpick. But at this point it was worth it. I dished up some cubed cheese, apples, and a handful of pretzels. I know, no veggies, but he did eat all of his salad last night so I was cutting him some slack. Anyway, I made a big show of the fantastically wonderful toothpicks and set the plate down before him. No kidding, the kid ate every last bite in under 15 min. A new land speed record around here. Shockingly, the pretzels were last, perhaps because they did not necessitate a pick?

Here's the satisfied customer showing off his amazingly cool 'picks.

This little man finds that one's toes are far more appetizing than cheese or apples could ever be!

He just recently started this feat of acrobatics - at least it's a gold-medal earning feat around here where I'm considered the most "bendy" person and I can barely touch my toes! It is so cute to watch him do this, although I find myself wondering when his last bath was. He's not walking yet so how dirty can those feet really be, right?

MMMMM!

Tomorrow he has his 9 month checkup so I'll update more then, but I am simply blown away that this little man is already so big. I wish he could get better though - still fighting the runny nose, congestion etc. Poor guy, it must be miserable to not be able to blow your nose:(

I just started reading Beth Moore's So Long Insecurity and so far it's been an easy read, but I have stopped on a couple of different points so far. Namely, how common insecurity of some sort is to most women, and how irritating this is!!! I for one am done with this, and as she aptly pointed out, for me, it is a place of self-centeredness when I am so concerned/worried about how I look/feel in a situation. I find myself constantly sizing up other women - comparing, judging, you name it. I so want to shed this ugliness, un-Christlike attitude! My friend H read and reviewed this on her blog, so you can check that out too. I'll keep you updated on my own journey too.

Better

2010-04-29T10:43:00.000-05:00

Wow, 2 more posts in one day! Making up for lost time? just an update - things are much better here. 2 growups talked like grownups should. Little people were angels while one of the grownups walked 3 miles:) And 1 friend/neighbor was a blessing to walk/talk with! Thank you Lord for your provision and grace. Praying your day is full of small blessings too!

A rocky start

2010-04-29T07:44:00.000-05:00

Oh boy. This morning got off to a rocky start. Ryan had his worst night last night. He was up at 12 and was inconsolable. I finally got a burp our of him and then rocked him and he fell asleep. Then he was up at 4 - another bottle only half drunk, but at least he fell asleep quickly. Of course Will woke at 5 - not sure why, but luckily he heeded my warning, and didn't make any more noise:) Mommy was already growling:)
I have been setting my alarm to go off 15 min. earlier than usual. Trying to squeeze in some quiet time and get the morning started right. Unfortunately, not one morning this week has it worked out. Either the other kids were already awake, or as in this morning b/c I was so tired, I hit snooze. Chewie decided that he HAD to go out though so I got up and attempted to let him out. He must have been waiting longer than I thought because by the time I went to put him on the run, he couldn't hold it in and proceeded to pee! And because he knew I was mad he ran away from me, leaving a trail of pee!!!! UGH!! I was so NOT a nice person to that poor dog. I even threw a book in his direction trying to make him stop running away from me. Um, yeah mel, that would make a poor little dog stop running away from you -a book hurled in his direction! I finally managed to corner him and literally threw him out the door. To boot, Jack and Will witnessed the whole thing! So, after asking the Lord's forgiveness, I asked for the kids' too. Oh my. All this on the heels of the ugliness that has settled in the house - please Lord let this be the day this cloud is lifted and Satan is shown the door!

The lion is lurking in the shadows

2010-04-28T07:43:00.001-05:00

Satan is working hard in this house. He smells blood. The blood of fresh wounds. Wounds caused by words and spiteful feelings that we seem to reserve only for those whom we love. "I always," "You never" "I do everything" - all of those ugly feelings are rearing their nasty, divisive selves. We all have our crosses on our backs and each of ours is heavier, has more splinters than anyone else's. Get the picture? Pray for us. We need to lay down our selfishness, our individual desires and reach out to one another in love. We need to boast in our weaknesses so that we can completely rely on Him.,

Poor baby

2010-04-27T14:57:00.000-05:00

Had to post these. Poor kid has really been knocked down by this cold. He is cutting teeth and I think, after the vomiting episode last week, his immunity was compromised and so he got this wicked cold. We went to the Dr. on Fri just to rule out ear infection etc. but got the all-clear. We've been giving him Benadryl too, but not wanting him to be drugged up all the time, only at night. The first two pics are just precious - he's got snot crusted all over his face, is red from being attacked by tissues every 5 seconds, and had just gotten up from an almost 4 hour nap!!!! The 3rd one totally cracks me up though. I was trying to get a pic of the 2 of us and this is what we ended up with - please note the giant snot bubble coming out his right nostril:)

I'm still standin'

2010-04-27T13:40:00.000-05:00

Good gravy! Yes we're still here - I thought that after Will's bout with the spring bug we were in the clear, but alas, that was not to be. Ella-Kathryn came down with it on Sat. Again we missed church, and a sweet celebration for Jack's dear sunday school teachers, but I got a butt ton of stuff done around the house:) After being here for going 3+ years, we finally put up some blinds in EK's room!!! I hemmed and hawed for all this time, just not sure if I wanted curtains etc, but am really digging the ease of darkening the room and the continuity it gives from the outside looking in.

The kids always have to be part of the project:)

Ella-Kathryn got herself a new fishing pole. The kids love to go fishing with their daddy, and when in FL, their Poppy. She had an itty bitty Barbie one that was just too small for such a big girl. She is thrilled to have this one and can't wait to catch a big one! I am always so surprised by her - in that second pic she just looks so big! I can still see that baby girl in there, but she is changing so much!

As I continue to deal with allergies, I have forgone the Zyrtec in favor of downing 2 Benadryl at night. Not the best course, but I can't spend that kind of dough every 14 days (yes even on generic). The down side is that beyond the normal "I'm a mom of 4 and NEVER get enough sleep because someone always has some kind of issue and/or I can only read uninterrupted at night and find myself reading on towards midnight b/c I just can" issue of having a hard time being a morning person with many cups of coffee, I now have to add an extra cup to couteract the Benadryl hangover. That my friends was a dang long sentence:) So, yesterday after 3 cups of cafe, I had done morning chores, and was attemtping to get ready to pick up EK for her dentist appt. Look people, I have a minimal "beauty" routine. Concealer and a ton of it because one of the things I inherited from my dear Grandmom Shuster was her dark underye circles, the other being a penchant for stubborn men, however there is not a product that can conceal a willful man:) Anyhoo, I've got to spackle that crap on, then eyeliner, mascara, maybe some eyeshadow and blush. That's it. Nothing too challenging right? Except that yesterday, I looked like either an addict in the throes of withdrawal, or a severely parkinson-ridden person. My hands were shaking so bad from the coffee that I put the mascara wand squarely in my eye! I did have my contact lens in, which probably spared my from a future as an asymetrical cyclops, but still. I mean, come on! I just wanted to NOT look like death warmed over and that's what I get???? I removed the lens washed it off and then proceeded to unspackle that eye, only to have to recoat the concealer. UGH. I'm thinking those Amish/Mennonites have it right. No makeup, comfy jumpers, and buns. Does anyone have a buggy I can borrow?

Tilt

2010-04-19T22:07:00.000-05:00

In the days after the earthquake in Haiti, I remember listening to NPR (yes I do get my news, sometimes, from the leftist devil itself) and a geologist, or some other such earth-science person, commented that while it would not be physically detected, the math wizards who endeavor to understand such things, believed that the magnitude of the quake had actually altered our axis. Minutely. Minisculely. Yet, there it was. The earth was now moving ever so differently than it had mere moments before. I totally got it. Because I too have had my axis altered. When death came for my mother, it was as if someone stuck a pin on my timeline. To the left of the pin, mothered. To the right of the pin, motherless. Tilt. It literally felt like I was walking cockeyed, or that I had entered a Magritte or Dali painting where the individual pieces make sense, but put together seem imcomprehensible. The Magritte where the smartly suited man has on a bowler hat and his face is a green apple. I felt as though when I looked in the mirror, yes of course there should be a green apple where my face was, afterall, my mom was gone. Things that had once been illogical I could now nod my head in agreement with. Grief is so intensely personal. It never fully leaves you, rather, seems to linger in an ebb/flow pattern. Sometimes your far enough up on shore that the waves hardly touch you. Others, you are wading in and the tide threatens to overcome you, the sorrow pulling you out to sea. The tide of sadness comes in washing up memories, like shells, some whole and beautiful, others cracked or only pieces. Eventually it turns, and goes back out, taking with it the sharpness and detail of remembrance. Time softens these memories, removes the clarity of her voice, the image of her face, the touch of her hands. This brings its own measure of grief, the sense of forgetting. Yet, my life is a testament to hers. Not only my literal life, which would not be without her own, but the simple fact that there was a measure of time before the pin, and there is now a life beyond it. Tilt.

The plague

2010-04-17T21:32:00.000-05:00

Ok, so apparently I do not have the serious allergies that I thought I did. When all was said and done, we definitely had a virus of some sort working it's way throught the house. Ryan started it, yes we'll blame the baby, but since his vomiting Tues. night, he's just had a couple of not so pretty diapers. No fever or anything else. I felt horrible Wed. afternoon and on into Thurs, but by Thurs. night was feeling a bit better. Again, no fever, just bad naseau, but never did throw up etc. Thought we were out of the woods until Fri. morning Jeff got bit by the devil himself. Poor man. It was ugly here. So I did what any good wife would do. Made sure he was comfortable, as comfortable as one can be in between bouts of violent vomiting, and the I took Will and Ryan and hightailed it out to meet up with H and her kiddos! Jeff did run fever later that day and really wasn't himself until this afternoon. I don't think he should go to work, but since he was out Tues b/c of his back and says he feels better, he's going in. The good news is that the chiropractor is helping his back but I don't think being hunched over hugging the porcelain god did much in the way of assisting his recovery:)
Will's dentist appt went better than expected? I put a question mark there b/c I think my expectations were pretty low! Ha! We had to wait forever just to get into the "exam." Then he wouldn't lie down for the hygenist. He did let her brush and floss his teeth, but no water squirter nor sucky wand was to come near him! It was all good though and they are so understanding of it all. Because we had to wait a bit for the dentist to come in, we left the examination area and went to another waiting room for a bit. There, Jeff bribed Will with the promise of a cheeseburger for lunch if he would lay down. It worked! He still didn't like it very much but he did it:) So we headed to steak n' shake for lunch!
We had 2 birthday parties today. One was just for EK and the other was for our sweet neighbor friend. I am trying to scan pics in from our Easter visit, but right now I've got a fussy baby to put to bed. Sweet dreams all!

out of commission

2010-04-15T08:49:00.000-05:00

There is a thick yellow film coating everything. Cars, driveways, deck railings, swings, you name it, it's covered. And even though we have our windows closed and the a/c is on (which I hate btw since I love fresh air and hate waising $ on running the a/c) because I think this might be the allergy season that does me in. I feel horrible. Yesterday I hosted our monthly ladies morning with 2 dear friends from a bible study and their kiddos. I was fine until we ended up outside to keep an eye on the little ones. Side note: kids love to be outside, but whenever you want them to stay outside, they keep coming back in! So, we were outside with them and then I had the doors open to the house b/c one of my friends keeps a baby who was sleeping inside. The end result was I inhaled and touched enough pollen to put me out of commission. My head filled, but sinuses started to throb and by evening I had an upset stomach. EK, Ryan and I ran errands after school and the whole time I thought I was going to hurl/need to curl up in the fetal position and just go to sleep right there in the store. I hate this. I despise feeling ill. No workout yesterday and as of right now I can't even imagine doing jumping jacks nor sit-ups. UGH!!!
Ryan threw up 2 nights ago, but had been fine ever since, so I don't think it's related, but really, who knows. Jeff's back is out, but the chiropractor is working on him and he feels better each day. Of course, spending all afternoon working in the garage yesterday I'm sure will speed up his recovery. Right. Stubborn man. I know that's the pot calling the kettle black - have no idea where our precious children get that trait...
Will has his first dentist appt. today. Pray for us. He's not quite so laid back as Jack and EK. I have an ominous feeling that there will be tears, yelling, and future therapy sessions which reveal that today was the defining moment for Will at which point he lost all trust in his parents.
Ok, so another wave of naseau just past. I'm going to change the truck otherwise known as Ryan, and attempt to get dressed. Hope you all have a great day devoid of pollen, naseau, headaches and wrenched backs:)

2010-04-11T19:55:00.000-05:00

First meeting with Gran and Ryan! He took to her so well - I was worried because he's just recently started to cry when he realizes someone other than me is holding him:) This picture is funny though, his expression is like, yeah ok, I'm not thrilled but I'll sit here. Aunt LaLa was adored by all, but I only took this one picture with the digital! When I get the hard copies in, I'll scan them in too.

We had a great visit with them, too short, but wonderful. The weather held out for us, so we were able to take some walks and spend time outside. The kids went to a movie and bowled, but mainly we just hung out, spending time with our sweet family. We miss them terrible already! Counting down the months til our beach rendezvous!

Ella-Kathryn has been talking about a loose tooth for months now, but I really didn't believe that it was ready to come out. Then this morning I looked over at her and her teeth looked funny. I asked her to show me her mouth and sure enough, the lower left tooth was super loose. We went on to church and then after headed to the fancy new Neighborhood Wal-Mart over by the super fancy houses at Pinnacle Hills. The dang thing looks like some Italian villa - wish I were kidding. They have a little café area, so we grabbed a couple of muffins - i was trying to tide them over til we could get home for lunch. Anyway, we're sitting there and again I look at Ella-Kathryn and notice her mouth looks funny. I ask her to show me her teeth, and this time the tooth was gone! She had swallowed it while eating her muffin!!!! Poor girl. She was a bit shocked, but not upset, thank goodness. I asked her if she had noticed anything weird or different when she was eating and she told me, "I thought I was eating something hard, but that it was part of my muffin!" Good grief:) Jack was worried the Tooth Fairy wouldn't come, so he said he'd give her 25 cents. Sweet boy. Not to be outdone, Will said to Jack, "yeah, me too, give her some cents for me" Our Tom Sawyer in the making - why give up your own money, when you can get someone else to give up theirs? Here's the new EK.

As I was tucking her in tonight, she said, "look at me, don't I look cute?" Yes my sweet girl, you do!

no pics, just an update

2010-04-06T08:00:00.000-05:00

Our fave Aunt LaLa and Gran are in town! They arrived Sat and are here through Fri am, then back on to NJ. We are so happy that they decided to spend their spring break with us. So far, we've had a sleep over, gone to church, played at the park - I'm sure there's much more to come!
Easter was great - beautiful weather, great lunch with the in-laws. Poor Jeff had only slept an hour and a half on Sat evening, worked all night, worked the church in the am and then stayed up to have lunch with us. What a trouper:)
Confession: I have lapsed, majorily, in my 90 day reading plan. It started with a night when I didn't feel great and went to bed early. From there it kind of snowballed, and now I find myself about 10 days behind. I am not stressing it, just bummed that it was going so well, and then, speedbump! I'm back on track now and hope to be finished next month. I'll keep you posted.
Celebration - I'm 5 lbs down:) I worked out 6 days last week and hope to keep that schedule. It works for me to do it 6 days and while it's certainly not easy with the kids, so far I've been able to do it. I imagine someone looking in my window - sweaty, red-faced mom trying her best to keep up, sometimes cussing at the lady on the tv telling her to "keep going, if you want results you have to push", the mom shushing the baby in the exersaucer because he's already been in there for 15 min and his little butt hurts, yelling to the other room at the 2 year old to just wait a few more minutes that a poopy diaper never hurt anyone, every 5 minutes having to yell at one or both dogs to hush up/stop fighting/get out of my way:) Oh well. It's my crazy life and I love it!
Hope you had a blessed Easter and a great start to your week.

Faith

2010-03-31T13:08:00.000-05:00

Reading Ann Voskamp's blog this morning, I was stopped dead in my tracks by this quote.

Belief is not merely an agreement with facts in the head, it is also an appetite for God in the heart, which fastens on Jesus for satisfaction. ...

Therefore eternal life is not given to people who merely think that Jesus is the Son of God.
It is given to people who drink from Jesus as the Son of God... The point of these images of drinking and eating is to make clear the essence of faith. It is more than believing that there is such a thing as water and food.
Faith is coming to Jesus and drinking the water and eating the food so that we find our hearts satisfied in Him.
~ John Piper, Future Grace

As I continue my weightloss/fitness journey, I learn how my body can be pushed beyond what I think it can handle. Each time I can go a bit further, do a few more reps, comlete a whole set. But I have become complacent in my relationship with God. I am not pushing the limits, seeking after Him with my whole heart. I cook for my family, clean my house, wash clothes, and then, give Him some time. I do not want to "merely think that Jesus is the Son of God." I want to "drink from Jesus." I want my very daily existence to be a complete dependence on Him and my heart to overflow with gratitude for my salvation. I don't know what this looks like yet, but I am confident that I will be pushed and stretched further than I thought I could be.

pics

2010-03-24T19:08:00.000-05:00

Look at my scary face mom!

This is what happens when you have too many kids and not enough room-they must sleep wherever they can. The dining room rug makes a perfect blanket:)

Hi - my name is Tex! See those hands on my shoulders? I'm being attacked by a munchkin!!!!

I'm Tex #2, the cockeyed cowboy

That's better, but still a bit big.

Watch out Aunt KK - I'm getting pretty good!

Poppy went to the Bahama's and all I got was this postcard - does he not know that I can't read yet!!!

My new bowlish haircut:)

Mom, this is not what we had in mind when we said we wanted to "do something" for Spring Break. (In reality, EK organized this "train" and they were kind enough to include Ryan. Moments after this was snapped, Ryan toppled over and bonked his noggin on the hardwood floor:( He survived though and is eating just fine, in case you haven't noticed!

Food

2010-03-23T14:24:00.000-05:00

I posted a while back about our decision to make some changes in the foods we bought/ate. I also wrote that I would post some of our meals. Yeah, that worked out well:)
Seriously though we have been doing pretty good around here. We found some chicken that we can buy locally and it costs only a few cents more/lb. We are still waiting on our 1/4 cow to be killed and processed. I looked back at our menus for the past 2 weeks and we have eaten 4-5 meatless meals/week. Last night we had Falafel Pita Pockets - essentially chick peas put into the food processor with some spices and an egg, formed into patties and fried in olive oil. Topped with a cucumber, red onion, yogurt dressing (for me and Jeff, the kids used ketchup or ranch both of which were are finishing and then NEVER buying again) and paired with a huge salad. I've served a variation of these chickpea patties before, just by themselves and Jack and EK were not crazy about them. The spices were different so maybe that was the problem. Jack has also decided that he doesn't like rice anymore. We buy spelt pasta and usually have that on hand, but it's still more expensive than the bag of organic rice. I'll keep putting it on his plate with different twists, but I feel like I'm fighting a losing battle! He has recently decided that there are several foods that he previously ate with gusto, which are no longer ok. We try to be sensitive to everyone's palates, but are also on limited funds and I am not a short-order cook! If there's something leftover from lunch that can be substituted in for what he doesn't like, then we'll try that, but otherwise, tough beans kid:)
So, we're doing well on our journey and I am constantly looking for recipes. If you have any good ones send them my way! I did make up a snack for us yesterday. I had some pitas that were on their way out, so I cut them into wedges, brushed them with water, sprinkled on some cinnamon and sugar and then broiled them for a minute. We dipped them in some low-fat vanilla yogurt (Stoneyfield). Delish! This kind of stuff satisfies my snacking tendency - I want several pieces of something, rather than one big thing. I know it's totally mental, but that's why thinks like frozen grapes are so appealing to me too. If you're a snacker, how do you satisfy that need while not busting the calories/budget/health issues?

Spring Break Baby!

2010-03-23T13:54:00.000-05:00

OK, so the 'baby' part of the title was totally a gratuitous throw back to my hay days of actual spring break trips, pre-children, and pre-thou shall not drink mass quantities of any form of alcohol b/c as parents and health care professionals so aptly point out, it will make you dumb and do dumb stuff. Plus it makes you fat. If for no other reason than that, I should have avoided that liquid poison, but alas, my inability to make quality choices, in beverages as well as men, reigned for a good 5 year span. Thank God (literally) that I survived those years:)
Anyhoo, we are going nowhere this spring break. We didn't last year either and it all seemed to be OK. The children were not scarred, at least not that I can tell now. Maybe in 20 years I'll get a bill from their shrink listing: damages incurred during boring spring vacation, $3,000. Damages incurred while being made to wear jeans without holes in them, $1,000 (that's for Jack). Damages incurred while being denied every piece of candy that ever came across his/her path, $4,000.
Oh well. Hey, I wasn't allowed to wear jeans to school until I was in high school. Prior to that it was corduroys and colored jeans (thank goodness they were in style then). Yes, I am still traumatized thank you very much for asking. My parents considered jeans, or dungarees, as work/chore/farm pants, certainly not acceptable for school. School was our 'job' and as they would never wear jeans to work, neither should we wear them to school. Eye rolling is completely necessary here, so feel free. While I respect the sentiment, and I cannot blame anyone other than myself for the corduroy knickers that I wore in the 5th grade (you read that right, I wore knickers, with knee-hi socks, and a high-collared blouse with coordinating corduroy blazer), I do think it added fuel to the fire of rebellion that burned deep inside my teen-angst ridden self. Or not. I could have just been a rotten kid. Whose to say.
Speaking of rotten kids. This one got a much needed haircut last night. While I dug the shaggy frat boy 'do, it was becoming more of a mountain man/kid 'do so Jeff trimmed him up.

When Jeff first finished I said it looked kind of like a bowl cut, and it does. But cuter and no so bowlish. Here's the happy customer with his ice cream cone. I caught him mid "cheesebooger" which is what all the professional photographers have their subjects say when taking their pics.
Beautiful weather has returned here, so we all hit the walking trail for some bike riding/walking. Ryan fell asleep in the backpack carrier - too cute, but forgot my camera so no pics. Trust me it was adorable:)
Hope you all have a great day!

How felony got her groove back

2010-03-21T11:23:00.000-05:00

So once upon a time I was affectionately nicknamed "Felony," I'm sure it was in no way an indication of my lifestyle at the time. Er, well, anyhoo. It always makes me laugh just knowing that I, of all people, ended up marrying a cop. While Jeff is not your stereotypical cop, on a power trip and just itching to bust somebody, anybody, he is nevertheless a member of the law enforcement community. Ironies abound. Last week I was in a funk. Nothing major, just a plain ol' funk. I ate some cookies. Watched some old movies. And by mid-week, was on my way out of Funksville. Friday we had spring weather, Jeff and I took Will and Ryan for a walk, then, on the first official day of Spring we got the news. A cold front was headed our way, promising to dump inches of snow on us. UGH!!! Now I love snow as much as the next girl, but come on! Don't tease me with the 70's and then send me back to my wool cardie with the 30's! For the record, I really didn't believe that we were going to get the snow. I have zero trust in weather people. I am pretty sure I could just show up at the tv station, look at the satellite images, and give it a go. Hey, if I'm wrong I still have a job. Hope there are no touchy weather people reading this.

Ok, back on track here. The snow started last night and this is what we woke up to.

Not spring. Winter. Not happy. Headed back to Funksville.

Well, not just yet. Because I have a funny family. They make me laugh. All. The. Time.

Like my dear hubbie who is willing to play games with our kids. I personally am not a fan of playing cars, hide-n-seek etc. Go ahead. Report me to the bad mommies commission. I am not afraid of them.

Here's Jeff "hiding" from Will during a rowdy game of Hide-n-seek. Actually it really is fun to do this with Will since he often overlooks the obvious. One time Jeff just stood in the corner of our dining room with a blanket over him. We have a very open floor plan, so I use the term 'hiding' very loosely here. Not kidding, Will walked right by him. Twice. As if there was always a 6 foot green blanket in that corner.

This is what Ryan is doing to pass the time in the tundra. He is almost sitting up on his own. Hence the surrounding pillow fort. Happy as always!

Ella-Kathryn yet again conned her little bro into playing dolls. Unfortunately, Will has adopted this feminine style with an unnerving ease. He was adamant that he take his purse to Wal-Mart yesterday. And he about lost his mind when we got home and he left it in the car. "Purse. Garage. Car." he cried to me. Well, hold onto your pink panties little man, I'll go get your purse in just a minute. This of course goes well with his hording of all personal items in his pants pockets. Every coin, and paper currency he has must be carried in his pants. Every day. No ifs, ands or buts. Also the collapsible magnifying glass, mini tape measurer, and if he's feeling plucky, his stubby pen. In case he needs to write something down.

Jack, still in jammies, found solace and quiet in his room. That lasted for 2 minutes. Jack went to a sleep over birthday party Fri and apparently at lunch had a caffeinated root beer. That explained why he was not so grouchy as he usually is when he comes home from spending the night with a friend. However, by 4 all bets were off and some sort of demon beast clawed its way out of my precious son. Snarky comments, sassy retorts and a veritable plethora of disobedient acts followed, until he was bathed and put to bed by 7. A time which was about 2 hours over due if you ask me:) He is much better this morning, praise the Lord!!!

Ok, so the world's longest post is over. I am posting a pics only post too just to get some stuff off of my camera. Hope your day is wonderful - warm and springy:)

New day

2010-03-17T08:50:00.000-05:00

So, yesterday was one of those blah days. I headed to bed at 8:30, took 2 Tylenol PM's, read my bible, and promptly fell asleep - before 9! While I can't say I jumped out of bed this morning, I definitely don't have that cloud hanging over me. Ironic, since it's overcast and rainy today! Oh well.
I called my sister to give her the update and mentioned that I had to get down the 9-12 month clothes for Ryan. Jeff had been commenting on the snug fit of all of Ryan's clothes. His feet are busting out of the feet of his jammies and the sleeves are always too short. This morning I grabbed a pair of jammies off the top of the pile I had put in his room, and they fit great! I pulled the tag up to see if was a 9-12 or just a 9 mo and lo and behold it was a month!!! Oh my gracious this boy is GROWING:) What a blessing he is and it is such a joy to see him so healthy and happy. I put one of his NICU pics on the mantle - to be a constant reminder of how far He has brought us. It's one where he is lying on his side, hands clasped together, tubes everywhere. He still does that with his hands and it always makes me smile. Right now he's blowing raspberries as he sits in his exersaucer:)
Last night in my reading of the end of 2Kings, I was again reminded of how long the Israelites went against God. So many kings and generations of people were led astray from His commands. During Jereboam's reign, the Lord finally swept all of the Israelites away to Assyria and the king of Assyria replaced the people of Israel with those from Babylon, Cuthah and others. but the Lord sent lions to kill some of these, so the Assyrian king sent back to Israel one of the exiled priests to teach the people how to worship the Lord. So they did worship the Lord, but "they continued to follow the religious customs of the nations from which they came...They follow their former practices instead of truly worshiping the Lord and obeying the laws, regulations, instructions, and commands he gave the descendent's of Jacob, whose name he changed to Israel." 2Kings 17:33-34
What struck me was that as a follower of Christ, how many times to I fall back to my "former practices." I was never a believer/follower of another "religion," but I did try to do things out of my own strength. And I find myself failing again and again when I fall back into that practice/habit. When we turn our hearts and lives over to Him, we are to do all things through Him, our filter is Him. Furthermore, how often am I reflecting my culture and contemporary surroundings, rather than His death for me? How often am I watching a movie, reading a book, speaking with language that does not show my nonconformity? I should stick out like a sore thumb in my culture. No longer are we bound to those laws and regulations, but the commandment to love one another stands strong in Him and it should in me.

A day

2010-03-16T11:07:00.000-05:00

Today is a hard day. No specific reason. Potty-training. Hospital bills. Food choices. Debt repayment. Life on this planet. It's just hard sometimes. I pray. I cry a bit. I wipe faces, bottoms, counters, toilet seats, dog paws. I pray. I dream. I hope. I make time to read His word. I find reassurance and comfort. I pray. I move on.

Shabby Apple Shakespeare Garden Dress GIVEAWAY!!!!

2010-03-11T12:39:00.000-06:00

Love me a give away, and this dress looks so comfy yet chic for spring. I love dresses, need more of them, and have no $ to spend on them right now, so a give away is perfection (anyone get the reference there?)
So here's the link if you want to enter too. But if you win you have to share the dress with me:)

Shabby Apple Shakespeare Garden Dress GIVEAWAY!!!!

Happy Anniversary

2010-03-10T07:57:00.000-06:00

I never got around to blogging yesterday, so here's a belated (ok, totally funny I just typed bleated haha) shout out to my sister and her hubby - Happy Anniversary! It's been 8 years for them - easy for me to remember since they got married mere weeks after Jack was born. The wedding was perfect and my sister looked amazing! She had a TON of bridesmaids (I can't even remember how many!) and they were all so sweet and helpful to her on the big day. What is so funny is that Jack was about 8 weeks old and I was breastfeeding him. I had smooshed my post pregnancy body into a beautiful skirt/top that my sis had picked for us. I had bought one of those fat-taming undergarments which I highly recommend, and somehow wrangled my loose flesh and nursing tata's into the appropriate places. We had left the hotel and reconvened at the church awaiting the ceremony. I wanted to make sure that Jack wouldn't be hungry during the service, so I sat down in the designated room, which happened to be a children's Sunday school classroom. TINY little chairs! So I plopped myself down and somehow wrangled the top up around my neck and proceeded to nurse. All was well, or so I thought, until my lap felt kind or warm and wet! Sure enough, Jack had pooped and it all went right on through all over my skirt! We were, I think, within about 30 minutes of starting the ceremony, so those girls went right into action. One had my skirt off and was washing it in the little bathroom. Another had Jack and was changing him. Another ran to her car and grabbed her hairdryer so we could dry off the skirt once it had been cleaned. I felt like some bizarre beauty pageant contestant, with everyone buzzing around me, doing things for and to me while I just stood there shell-shocked. My baby had pooped on me, on my sister's wedding day! Oh cruel world! In the end, all was well. The skirt looked fine, my poor aunt had to handle a not so happy baby, but the wedding itself went perfectly. It was the last big family gathering before my mom's dad passed, and several years before the shadow of cancer would lurk in the corners of our lives. Those wedding pictures hold memories of a big crazy family, hope for a new marriage, and if you look closely enough to see the miserable baby being held by the mommy with the forced smile, the optimism that is inherent in bringing a child into this wonderful but unpredictable world.